My Evil Stoopid Kitty Brudder

This is Zaphod Beeblebrox McLean, AKA The Bane of my Dogzistance. Oh, he may look cute here, but don't let that fool you. He is pure evil.

One day Mom was out minding her own business and he insisted on coming home with her. Mom, obviously brainwashed, decided she wanted to keep him, and thought the odds would be better if she let Daddy name him. (Well, she prolly won't be making that boo-boo again!)

Whenever Mom takes a pitchure of Zaph, she has to make sure to not use the flash cuz he glares at her. (I think the flash just picks up his true evil self.)

How is Zaph evil? You want a list?

1. He sprawls on his back on the bed, exposing his big furry tummy and then attacks my head when I stick my nose in there.

2. He gets T*R*E*A*T*S as soon as he gets Mom up efurry morning. I sometimes hafta wait 'til Daddy goes to work. (But sometimes I get both, if I time it right.)

3. He sits on top of things and then launches his hefty self at me as I trot by.

4. Mom loves him. Daddy loves him too (but he loves me better).

5. He coughs up really nummy things on the floor but usually does it loudly enough that the hoomins hear him so it's gone before I can check it out.

Sometimes, though, he'll curl up next to me when I'm napping. Then when I wake up, this is what happens.
But I guess he's not all bad. I do get to herd him when he tries to get OUT, and sometimes he leaves his bits of steak from Daddy fur me to eat. And he can sometimes have a dogliciously stinky butt. And when he runs and hides in the basement, and Mom and Daddy accidentally lock him in down there, I do kinda miss him.

After all, he is my stoopid brudder.