According to Piper

Piper's Guide to Golf

2012-01-08T11:29:00.008-04:00

Well, I was rilly starting to wurry that the weak-end was going to be a complete and udder disappointment. I mean, yesterday the noisy box went off and Daddy got up and turned it off, just like he does every Catterday morning, so I was furry excited. So I was good to my hoomins, figgering I'd let them sleep for another seven minnits befur making them take me somewhere fur funfunfun.

But at the six minnit mark, they both got up and then started getting reddy fur werk. Werk?! On a Catterday?! But what about ME?! Where's my funfunfun!

Well, there was no way that was gonna happen this morning! Daddy kilt the noisy box and as soon as he lay back down, I was in his face! Wagwagwag! Licklicklick! Whinewhinewhine! You nose -- the whole excited puppy dog routine. And befur long, Daddy muttered and Mom groaned and soon we were in the zoom-zoom, heading fur funfunfun!

We went in the zoom-zoom to a place called a Golf Course. There were a couple of other zoom-zooms there, but no hoomins in sight.

Now, iffen you don't nose about golf, I'll splain. It's how hoomins play fetch by themselves. They have a little ball and they hit it with a stick and then they go chase it. They chase it all over the hills and the grass and sometimes the sand and trees. And then they go home.

Well, hoomins aren't furry good at playing fetch in the winter, I guess, but that's okay. I'm an all-weather-fetch kinda doggy, and the best part about the golf course is that Daddy can chuck the ball a rilly-rilly long ways!

(Mom note: The real best part about the golf course is that we actually have a hope of wearing Piper out, once she's run up and down the hills a few dozen times!)

So we played fetch at the golf course for about an hour and it was so much funfunfun!

After a while, I thought Daddy might be tired, so I laid down in the snows and let him rest fur a few minutes. I ated some snows and then I ran back up the hill again in case my hoomins were lonely.

Just in case you're wundering just how far Daddy threw the ball, I'm including this pitchure to show you.

The pitchure is taken from the furry top of the hill where Mom and Daddy were. That dark speck in the middle of all the white space is mememe!

Fangu, hoomins, fur finding me a new favrit thing! I can't wait until next weak-end to go play golf again! (wagwagwag)

Happy Nude Ears!

2012-01-01T14:07:00.004-04:00

Happy Nude Ears, efurrydoggy and hoomin! My Nude Ears rezolooshun is to blog more often, since Gamma and Ont Merry an' utherhoomins like to read about my 'ventures. So here I yam! (wagwagwag)

Kissmoose was furry good at our den. Santy Paws brought me two new toys -- a dragon named Pinky (who has both a skweeker and a crinkly-sounding part) and a skwirl named Skwirly. I woof them both, but I think Pinky is my favourite. In this pitchure, I'm unwrapping a chewie, I fink. Fangu, Santa Paws!
Mom's gone and gotten a job, so she's not home napping furry much this winter. I miss napping with my hoomins, but I like running and playing better. On the weak-ends, I nose when my hoomins don't hafta go to werk, so I make sure that they get up and take me sumwhere fun! Fur instance, we went up to Rockwood Park to run in the woods today. Running in the woods is my fave-rit thing! (wagwagwag)

Well, Mom's rubbin' her eyes, so I think it might be nap time. If you liked this blog post, you can leave a comment, or mebbe send me some nice cream. (wagwagwag)

Spring Fever!

2011-03-13T19:39:00.020-03:00

It's coming! Ohmydogness, it's coming! I hear you, Spring! I SNIFF YOU!

Furst, it started wif da white b*th in my OUT only coming up to my belly. Then it onliest came up to my knees. And then Mom started throwing my tenny ball in my OUT and it dint go alla way to Pekingese! And now, everydoggy -- now there is the beginning of mud! I LOVE MUD!

I am runrunrunning around da house, and Zaph and Nero are scared little hairballs. But I gotta chase. I just gotta chasechasechase. And I gotta bounce! Bouncebouncebounce! Mom! Daddy! It's light out! You doan gotta werk today! Let's go PLAY!

So both yesterday and today, we went to my favrit BEACH. And the water was way out, so there was all kinds of room to RUNRUNRUN!

(Perfeshunal doggy on a closed track. Do not 'ttempt!)

This morning alla hoomins inna werld decided they wanted more light after supper, so they all decided to change their clocks at the same time! Now, I nose that hoomins can sumtimes have sum pretty weird ideas, but this one's not so bad. Maybe that means Daddy, Mom and I can GOTOBEACH efurryday again after werk, instead of just onna weekend. Oh, I hope so.

One of my furry favritest things to do at BEACH is to get wet and make splashes efurrywhere! Well, today I had my bestest splash yet! I was so HAPPY!

Mom said, driving back to our den, that the zoom-zoom smelled like wet dog. That was the bestest compliment I've had in a furry long time! I hope that the smell lasts cuz it's a long week and I doan want Daddy to miss me iffen he doesn't have to. But it prolly won't, cuz Mom keeps making it smell like choklit! (Her new stoo-stoo-stoodio is inside a yummy soap store.)

I'm not 'llowed to have choklit cuz I'm a doggy, but maybe I kin eat the soap and that way nodoggy will hafta b*th with it. (Why is that hoomins always b*th us when we gets good and stinky, ennyway?! Doan they know it's hard werk?) Ennyways ...

I'm just gonna rest fur a bit now, but doan worry. I'll be fully recharged in 'bout thirty seconds and we can PLAYRUNBOUNCE all over again!

I YAM BACK!

2011-03-06T20:32:00.009-04:00

Aroorooroo! I yam back, efurrydoggy! Did you miss me? I'm gonna try to blog more often, cuz Gamma and Ont Merry and Daddy keep sayin' I should, but it's so hard fur me to sit still!

Furst thing I gotta tell you is that there are more than four people living in our house now. There's Daddy, and Mom, and my kitty brudder, Zaphod Beeblebrox. But then Mom and Daddy went to visit Ont Merry one day and came home with THIS:

His name is Nero. Mom named him that because it's the It-al-yan werd fur black. But doan let that little kitty face fool you -- Nero finks he's an emperor. He came to live with us in September and at first hated efurrybody (even Mom -- how can anyfurrycritter hate MOM?!) but finally he got used to us.

And he and Zaph were furends in the beginning, but then Nero hit adull-escence and wanted to be more than furends with Zaph, iffen you nose what I mean. Ennyway, Nero went to the Pretty Lady Vet and she took his boy parts and he's all settled down now, but Zaph still hasn't furgiven him, and so Nero finks he's my new best friend. Which is okay, I guess, as long as he stays outta my spot, leaves my tail alone, and DOESN'T TOUCH MY DADDY!

But Daddy still loves me bestest. (He calls Nero "The Ne-ro-sis.")

Spring is coming and soon I'll be able to find all my tennis balls in the back OUT. The snow has been furry deep this year but Daddy has made sure I get out to play. The beaches where we live are self-cleaning because we're on the Bay of Fun-Day, which has the "highest tides inna world." I dunno what a "tide" is, but I'm furry glad the rocks doan have snow on them! (wagwagwag)

Ennyway, I will be back in a coupla days wif more of my 'ventures! Woof soon!

GC20WKP: A Cache For Piper

2010-06-12T17:57:00.003-03:00

Dear Mr. TheRetiredHiker and Mrs. SpruceGum,

You might remember that when you placed this cache in my honour, Mom and Daddy were fighting off flying pigs (swine flu), and then another time, Mom and I were gonna go fur it, but the path was icy, and Mom is way too good at fallin' down on top of me. Well, after that, Mom decided (and I agreed) that we would save visiting my cache fur a speshul occasion. Today was the day!

Today is my third burpday! And when Mom and Daddy asked me how I wanted to sillybrate my speshul day, I said that the furst thing I wanted to do was go find my cache!

Fangu so much fur putting it in such a beeyootiful spot! As you kin see in my pitchure, I had a furry good time!

Sincerely,
Piper McLean, Geohound

Happiness is ...

2010-05-24T10:27:00.000-03:00

... a contented puppy who loves her hoomins.

"Walk it."

2010-05-16T18:17:00.000-03:00

Even though it has been a furry long time since Mom and I became jillity drop-outs, I still remember how to do some of it.

Today, Mom and Daddy took me to a nice nature path at a place called Red Head. It was a furry nice long walk in the woods, but my most favouritist part was when there was a big fallen tree across the path! It was furry high but I wasn't scared at all! Mom said, "Walk it," and so I did -- three times!

I miss seeing the other doggies at jillity, but I'm glad I can still do some of it with Mom and Daddy whenever we go places.

It's Mudder's Day!

2010-05-09T08:56:00.004-03:00

I just heard Mom talking with her mom (my Gamma) on the long-distance-bark-machine, and she wished Gamma a "Happy Mudder's Day!"

Now this is a howliday I can get into!

Happy Mudder's Day, Efurryone!

I feel so used ...

2010-04-03T09:54:00.007-03:00

Furst of all, fangu fur still reading this blog. I nose I haven't been around in furever, but it's becuz Mom hasn't been home much to let me use her computer. (More on that later.)

That's not to say that my life is boring. Daddy has been taking me to the beach a lot lately, so I can run and jump and sniff and play!
Daddy has been doing his bestest to make sure I don't go out of my mind, but I feel bad fur him. You see, I'm pretty sure Mom's having an affair with someone named Fizzix. And she's not even discreet about it. Efurry time I turn around (and when you're mostly Border Collie, that's a lot!), Mom is saying to Daddy, "I really need to spend some quality time with my Fizzix."

I dunno who Fizzix is. I haven't met him. All I nose is that Fizzix hasn't seen her much the last few days because she's been home coughing and stuffs. It's good that I get to spend time with Mom again, becuz she's in bed sleeping lots, but I feel used. Can't I have Mom when she's healthy too? Why does she have to be with Fizzix more than me?

Oh well. At least I've still got Daddy. And I fink I heard Mom say the other day that she's looking forward to having more time after "this Fizzix thing is over." So maybe she's getting tired of him? She sounded kinda mad at Fizzix, acshully, now that I fink of it.

Oh nose! I wonder if Fizzix is another dog?! Now that would be grounds for DOGVORCE!

A New Park and a New Furend!

2010-01-09T12:18:00.003-04:00

Today Daddy took me on a play-date!

There's a new Bark Park in the nearby town of Quick-Pam-Kiss, and Mom's been gonna take me there fur a while now, because some geocachers put out a cache in my name there. But that was right when Mom and Daddy got the Flying Pig Disease, and Mom hasn't had a chance to take me yet. In fact, Mom couldn't even come today 'cuz she hadda get ready fur werk.

Well, Daddy has a furend named You-Win and last night, the two of them decided it was time fur me and You-Win's dog, Haggis, to meet. So Daddy called You-Win this morning, and then off Daddy and I went to the Quick-Pam-Kiss Bark Park!

This is me and Haggis. Now, I've heard Mom talk about Haggis before. She says Haggis is food made out of a sheep's stomach, but I think she might be foozed, because he smelled like a doggy to me!

When Mom saw the pitchures of Haggis, they really made her smile, because she says Haggis looks like a cross between me and my predecessor, Pepsi. Mom really wished she could have been there fur my first date with Haggis, but Daddy took lotsa pitchures.

Haggis and I played together and had a lot of funfunfun! It was wonderdog! And there were lots of other doggies there too! I did my best to round them all up but they wouldn't pretend to be sheep fur me.

This was only the second Bark Park I've ever been to, but it was furry nice. I especially liked the fact that they had a newsstand out in the middle of it.

I really had a great time with Haggis and the other doggies! Can't wait to go back sometime soon -- and maybe find my geocache, too!

Yay Fur Winter!

2009-12-28T10:58:00.003-04:00

Mom and Daddy took me up for a romp in Our Park. There were lots of doggies there. The road was a little icy, so Mom was doing her baby-step-shuffle, but that didn't slow me down at all!
I love the holidays! And winter! And snow! And EFURRYTHING!

Hairy Kissmoose!

2009-12-25T10:04:00.007-04:00

As soon as I saw the big tree in the livingroom in our den, I knew that it would soon be Kissmoose and prezzies-time! And -- just like I hoped -- Santa Paws CAME!
Santa Paws always wraps my prezzies cuz he knows I like unwrapping gifts just as much as Mom does. (Unlike Mom and Ont Krista when they were mini-hoomins, I acshully wait until Kissmoose to unwrap mine. Of course, the fact that I can't get at them 'til the hoomins fork them over might have sumfin to do with it, too.)
Anyway, Santa Paws brought me a new chewie!
(I love you, Santa Paws! Fangu furry much! And Zaph says fangu too.)
I told Zaph he could come tell you about his new prezzie (a mousie attached by 'lastic to a thing that hangs on a doorknob) but he's become a little bit obsessed. Daddy was furry happy that Zaph liked his prezzie this year, because most years he ignores what Santa Paws brings him. But Daddy thinks he's going to have to hide Zaph's prezzie at night if the hoomins want any sleep!

Daddy laff-barked really hard when Zaph knocked it off the doorknob and scampered down the stairs with his prey. No wonder Daddy calls Zaph "Mighty Hunter!" (I call Zaph "Mighty Stoopid," but that's just my opinion.)

Hairy Kissmoose, efurryone!

Trip to The Evil Doctor (aka TED)

2009-12-21T19:59:00.006-04:00

Well, I knew that that dewclaw / don't-claw was going to mean nuffin but trubble.

It wasn't as bad as last time. It stopped bleeding that night, but Mom and Daddy kept checking on it. Efurrytime they looked at it, I did my bestest to limp and hop and look pitiful so that I'd get T*R*E*A*T*S. Mom said that I was a little diva and deserved a Cad-Me Award, cuz the rest of the time, I was running and jumping and chewing on Zaph as if nuffin was wrong!

So when Daddy told me to get into the zoom-zoom, I had a sneaky spishon that we were going to go to TED. And I was right.

Well, I thought maybe that if I was a good girl and got weighed and gave kisses, I could get out of there without acshully seeing TED. No such luck.

I hadn't been to see TED in over a year, but I still remembered that I DON'T like being on his zamination table!

He looked in my nears and in my eyes and felt me all over. And then he took out a pair of clippers and chopped off all my toes! Not just the broken don't-claw, but all of them! And I cried and howled and yodelled and buried my face against Mom and begged her to rescue me, but it was no good. She was useless.

And then, after taking my toes, TED shot me in the neck with Vac-See-Nations!

And what did my hero, Daddy, do while all this torture was going on? Did he pick me up and run? Did he tell TED to put my toes back? Did he tell TED to be gentle with me, his little girl? No...

HE TOOK PITCHURES OF MY PAIN AND SUFFERING!

I fired Daddy as my hero right then and there. I mean, Mom held me and I know she doan like needles either, and she kept pawlogizing, but Daddy thought he was the paw-paw-rottsies!

I made up my mind to neffur speak to Daddy again -- or at least not until Kissmoose -- but then he told me I was a good-girl and on the way home, we went to get me zoom-zoom-food. (Mom and Daddy call them McDonalds french fries, but they're MINE, not Old MacDonald's!)

Anyway, my don't-claw feels better now, and Mom says that I don't have to get shot again anytime soon, so that's good.

And Daddy is my hero again. He gave me T*R*E*A*T*S and we share a pillow at night, so I can't stay mad at him fur long.

But TED? I'm sticking my tongue out at YOU!

Fur the Love of Dog...

2009-12-18T20:56:00.003-04:00

I'm injured. Not bad -- just a broken do-claw. Or a don't-claw. I can neffur remember which one it is. I've done it before and I was hoping I could hide it because it will mean a trip to The Evil Doctor (aka TED).

But Daddy saw the blood, and picked me up and took me to Mom, and since Mom just took a Furst Aid/See Pee Are course this week, she was pretty quick with the bandage. I HATE THE BANDAGE.

So I'm limping around, doing my best to look pathetic, hoping the hoomins hurry up and make with the T*R*E*A*T*S. I haven't seen any yet.

(sigh)

Our hoomins have (t)issues.

2009-11-19T13:57:00.004-04:00

PIPER: Please excuse the quality of the pitchures fur this post. Zaphod doesn't know how to work a camera.

ZAPHOD: Do so.

PIPER: Do not. (pause) Okay, so I'm teaming up with the walking hairball today because we're a little concerned about our hoomins, Mom and Daddy.

ZAPHOD: I like the pitchure you took of me. You captured my mist-ee-ree-us side.

PIPER: Please stop using words I don't know how to spell without looking them up.

ZAPHOD: Sorry. I keep furgetting that you're not as smart as me.

PIPER: Am so! I even went to school!

ZAPHOD: Yeah, but only because you didn't know to listen to Mom and Daddy in the furst place. Didn't I tell you that you'd get more T*R*E*A*T*S if you did?

PIPER: (snort) Anyway, Mom and Daddy are acting furry weird, because Zaphod got them sick.

ZAPHOD: I did not!

PIPER: Well, they're constantly coughing up hairballs! Haven't you noticed?

ZAPHOD: They aren't coughing up hairballs -- they're barking! Like you! It's your fault. Nice try, Tennis-Ball-Brain!

PIPER: Uh-oh -- you said "tennis ball." I miss my tennis balls! I miss my FETCH. It's been furry nice having them both in bed fur days on end, and the naptime has been furry enjoyable, but ... (whimper)

ZAPHOD: I don't care. As long as they feed me, I'm happy.

PIPER: (appraising Zaph's bulk) Yeah, no kidding.

ZAPHOD: (ignoring the beautiful black and white dog who is typing this and can therefore type what she wants) So, I overheard Mom telling someone she and Daddy have swine flu, and that it got worse and they got throat infections and ear infections, and bronc-eye-tiss, and Mom has new-moan-ia.

PIPER: "Swine," like in "pigs?"

ZAPHOD: And "bronc," as in "horses." Yep. That's what she said.

PIPER: We've got PIGS AND HORSES to compete with for our hoomins' attentions?! And I didn't SMELL them?

ZAPHOD: Yeah, well, if it's not round, fuzzy, day-glo yellow and flying through the air, you don't notice nuthin', Piper. (yawning) As long as I get fed ...

PIPER: Can I chew on your head fur a little while?

Sunday = Funday!

2009-11-09T16:28:00.008-04:00

Hello, furends! I want to tell you about the wunderdog time I had with Mom yesterday!

As most of you know, my favourite thing in the whole wide world is a good game of FETCH. If there is a tennis ball in motion, I am so there! And there! And THERE!

We usually play FETCH in the backyard, but it's been really muddy there lately. When Daddy brought me in the other night, I was a black and brown doggy! Well, I hate getting a B*TH, but I love FETCH more, so I guess it's okay.

Well, yesterday morning, after finding an easy geocache, Mom took me to FETCH HEAVEN!

Not far from our den is a big park, and in the summertime a lot of hoomins bring big moving dens and park them all in the same place. But after Canadogian Fangsgiving, they all go home, leaving a big, fenced-in, gravelly open space. So yesterday, Mom took me and the Chuck-It and the ball up there. And Mom threw the ball as far and as hard as she could, over and over and over again, just for me!

Happiness is having fetched the ball so far so many times that you

have to take a rest on the way back!

Once Mom saw that I was getting tired (Momnote: Hallelujah!), she decided we would then play a game of "Walk-it" with the picnic tables! Mom saw how a bunch of them were lined up in a row and so she got me to run up and down alla picnic tables in a row! (We stopped going to Jillity a year ago when Mom sprained her ankle, but of course I 'membered what "walk-it" means! I am a Border Collie mystery mix, after all!)

When I got home again, I was so tired that I went back to bed with Daddy and went right to sleeps!

Mom and I had so much fun up at the No-Moving-Dens-Now Park yesterday that we're going to try to go again soon. Right now, though, we're gonna go take a nap! (wagwagwag)

The Great OUTdoors

2009-11-01T10:10:00.004-04:00

Yesterday Mom had to go to a store, so Daddy and I went too, and after the store, we went to The Beach! There are lotsa beaches around here, and it's a good thing, too, because Daddy loves to take pitchures of water. LOTS of pitchures of water.

This beach was on the way to Red Head and the water was furry angry. Daddy took some pitchures and Mom did too, but the wimpy hoomins said it was cold, so we didn't stay furry long. Still, I got to run and sniff and play, and that made it an AWESOME time to be me!

On Friesday, Daddy stayed home from work to play with me. Mom went out, and as soon as the coast was clear, Daddy and I got in his zoom-zoom and went fur a walk in the woods. We haven't been walking in the woods as much as I'd like, because of icky-tickies, but they're prolly all dead now. I got shot so the icky-tickies won't hurt me, but they still gross Mom out.

I like it when Daddy stays home from work. It not only means three days of funfunfun instead of two, but he makes popcorn all three days too! I wunder how I can make this a habit fur him?

Hoomins these days ...

2009-10-30T10:00:00.001-03:00

Hello, everydoggy!

I nose it has been a furry long time since I've posted anything here. Blame Mom! Just because she and Daddy are trying to cut costs, she keeps turning off the pooter screen when she goes out without me (which is ALL THE TIME NOW), and I can't reach around to the button because I don't have thumbs! Sheesh!

And then there's Daddy. As everydoggy knows, I love my daddy. I think he's just wunnerful. Or at least I did. This week I found out he's a big fat fibber!

Whenever we play fetch in my OUT, Daddy says, "Don't lose the ball, Piper. Tennis balls don't grow on trees, you know."

Well, guess what?

I fink Daddy's got some 'splainin' to do. (wagwagwag)

Just so you know...

2009-09-30T19:49:00.002-03:00

Pleas vote fur us!

2009-09-02T22:08:00.001-03:00

Mom submitted a photo of me and Zaph in a contest on AnimalAttraction.com, a really cool online community for pet lovers that also helps homeless pets. Efurry time you log in, they donate money to a shelter.

You can vote fur us (once a day) here:
http://animalattraction.com/PhotoContest/ShareMyEntry/7582

Whoever wins the contest gets to select their favorite animal shelter or rescue group to receive a $250 donation from AnimalAttraction! The shelter I came from looked like they could really use it.

Fangs!

Dogs love uncondishunally ...

2009-08-16T10:24:00.003-03:00

... but Daddy is really pushing it.

This happened on Friesday, but it was so traumatizing that I could only post about it now.

Why doesn't he make ZAPH swim?!

A Day at The Summer Place (and More Torture By My Super-Hero Daddy)

2009-08-13T08:24:00.018-03:00

On Chewsday, Daddy came home early from work. I was furry confused, but when I saw him put my water bottle in the zoom-zoom, I didn't care where we were going, because I was getting to go, too!

Turned out Mom and Daddy and I all went down to The Summer Place. Nunkle Ken had invited all of the fambly to go down to the cottage fur a family get-together.

Well, it was a big sprize, because Nunkle Andrew, Anti-Dawna and Cuzzin Anna were there too! I'd neffur met them before, because they live in Albirda, which I guess is a furry long ways away. Daddy had figured out the sprize, because he's furry smart, but Mom had no idea. (I think Mom's head is full of rughooking wool half the time and that's why.)
I liked meeting the Albirda McLeans! Nunkle Stephen and Ont Lee and Daddy's sisters came, and all my hoomin cuzzins, and my doggy cuzzins Cecil and Coal were there, too, so we had a really good time together.

Or we did. Then Daddy decided to start the "swimming lessons" again. (That's Daddy Code fur trying to drown me.) He has this weird obsession with water and making me swim.

Well, I don't need lessons -- I can swim, as I showed him on Chewsday. But I DON'T LIKE IT and I don't need to swim if I don't go in above my tummy. Daddy will just have to learn to fetch his own tennis ball if he's gonna insist on throwing it in the water.

Well, after Daddy gave up on trying to drown me, I thought I was safe. That didn't last furry long at all! Further down the beach from my tennis ball was a big box-thing. I didn't pay too much attention to it because it was just sitting there, and it left the tennis ball alone, so I didn't care.

But all of a sudden Nunkle Stephen decided to climb up on it for a better look. It didn't like that at all! It started making a FURRY BIG NOISE and the water behind it started spinning and then I knew that the box-thing was really the Lake You-Toe-Pee-a Sea Monster. I started barking "RUN FUR YOUR LIVES!" but the hoomins didn't listen at all.

Next thing I knew, Daddy picked me up and put me on The Monster with the suicidal hoomins and climbed on with me! "It's a water-zoom-zoom," he splained, but he's delooshunul when it comes to water, so I didn't believe him fur a second.
Nunkle Stephen wrestled the Monster and made it go way way out into the middle of the lake, and I thought fur sure that we were all gonna die. All I wanted was to see my mom and my tennis ball again. Would I be able to chew on Zaph one more time?

Well, I'm becoming a bigger fan of Nunkle Stephen all the time. He's my hero. He got us all back alive.

Once I was back on the beach and away from The Monster, Nunkle Stephen decided to punish Daddy fur all of the stress he'd put me through. Nunkle Stephen made Daddy wear some sort of special torture harness.

Well, I thought I knew Daddy pretty well, but on Chewsday I learned something I didn't know: Daddy is part-fish.

The Monster decided it wasn't done, and it took off for the middle of the lake, stealing Nunkle Stephen and my cuzzins. Somehow Daddy managed to stand up on the water behind The Monster and he grabbed it by the tail and chased it. The Monster went in circles, trying to shake Daddy off, but Daddy was determined! He chased that Monster all over the lake! And then when Daddy had finally decided he'd picked on the Monster long enough, he let go of it and slid onto the beach on his feet.

My daddy is amazing.

Even if he wants to drown me.

Hey, hoomins!

2009-08-04T19:40:00.001-03:00

If it's hot enough for me to wallow in a mud puddle, then it's too hot for you to be caching!

Place Daddy's geocache already, and let's go get some nice cream!

This Blog Has Been Cat-Jacked.

2009-07-30T13:30:00.004-03:00

Okay, Dog. It's like this: you have chased me from my snooze on the bed one too many times. So while you're harassing Dad to throw the ball for you in the rain and doing your "Gimme Popcorn Dance", I'm posting on your blog.

Dear Blog Readers: Look deep into my eyes. Slowly, you are being drawn into their sea-green depths. Focus on what I'm saying. Fo-cussssss. You're getting sleepy. Your head is getting droopy. Listen the the sound of my purring. You are so relaxed, you will do exactly as I say. You will give me tuna. Anyt--

OOF! PIPER! Get your nose outta my butt!

Canines. Clearly an inferior species.

Neighbourhood Watch(dog)

2009-07-28T11:42:00.003-03:00

I have a furry important job at our den. I am a fierce guard dog.

No one goes up or down my street without my approval. As soon as I was tall enough to stand up in the front porch and "LOOK" (Daddy's word), I have been keeping two sharp canine eyes on efurrything that moves in either direction.I don't bark at the postal carrier, though, because he is a guffurment offishul. I just bark at dogs, kids, big trucks, and aliens. (Well, okay -- I haven't seen any aliens yet, but between my daddy being a mad scientist, and my stoopid kitty brudder being named after a character in Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, if any aliens show up on our street, trust me -- they'll be coming here furst.)

My Evil Stoopid Kitty Brudder

2009-07-24T07:49:00.010-03:00

This is Zaphod Beeblebrox McLean, AKA The Bane of my Dogzistance. Oh, he may look cute here, but don't let that fool you. He is pure evil.

One day Mom was out minding her own business and he insisted on coming home with her. Mom, obviously brainwashed, decided she wanted to keep him, and thought the odds would be better if she let Daddy name him. (Well, she prolly won't be making that boo-boo again!)

Whenever Mom takes a pitchure of Zaph, she has to make sure to not use the flash cuz he glares at her. (I think the flash just picks up his true evil self.)

How is Zaph evil? You want a list?

1. He sprawls on his back on the bed, exposing his big furry tummy and then attacks my head when I stick my nose in there.

2. He gets T*R*E*A*T*S as soon as he gets Mom up efurry morning. I sometimes hafta wait 'til Daddy goes to work. (But sometimes I get both, if I time it right.)

3. He sits on top of things and then launches his hefty self at me as I trot by.

4. Mom loves him. Daddy loves him too (but he loves me better).

5. He coughs up really nummy things on the floor but usually does it loudly enough that the hoomins hear him so it's gone before I can check it out.

Sometimes, though, he'll curl up next to me when I'm napping. Then when I wake up, this is what happens.
But I guess he's not all bad. I do get to herd him when he tries to get OUT, and sometimes he leaves his bits of steak from Daddy fur me to eat. And he can sometimes have a dogliciously stinky butt. And when he runs and hides in the basement, and Mom and Daddy accidentally lock him in down there, I do kinda miss him.

After all, he is my stoopid brudder.

Awesome Chewsday!

2009-07-16T08:37:00.006-03:00

On Chewsday morning, I was in the OUT, minding my own business, when Mom opened the back door to let me into our den -- or so I thought! But she had my leash and harness in her hand, and my travel water bottle, and OH MY DOG she started walking towards the zoom-zoom!

Mom has a friend from when she was a little girl way back -- her name is Ont Christine (or maybe Ant Christine, because she's practically Merikan now) -- and she and Mom haven't seen each other in a furry long time. Anyway, Christine LOVES me and I love her right back!

Since Christine wanted to learn about geocaching (pawsibly the most dangerous thing to say to my mama), Mom made up a big list of caches to go get! And we had so much fun! (Even when I ated too many sticks and then drank muddy water and barfed all over the trail!)

We went a lot of places I never went before, and one thing that was really weird was this house that we took the zoom-zoom right through!

Mom says there are lots of these weird houses in New Runsquick, but this was new to me! It was furry dark in there, but just as soon as I got used to it, we were out in the sunshine again!

After the drive-through house, we stopped for lunch at a place called Mama George's. Or maybe it was George's Mama? Anyway, I didn't get to see George or Mama because it was a hoomin food place and I couldn't go in, but Mom and Christine went inside for a minute, and then came out and ated with me at a table in the OUT.

And you guessed it -- I got ice cream!

I hope we can see Ont/Ant Christine next Chewsday! We had a lot of fun together! (wagwagwag) But, oh my dog, was I tired when I got back home!

Herding Toys

2009-07-10T22:49:00.003-03:00

I don't have any sheep to round up, so I make sure that my toys are where they should be -- in the middle of the hoomins' bed!

These are three of my favourites: BigBall, Maui, and Tug Toy. I would have a tennis ball here too, but my hoomins know better than to keep them where I can reach them if they want to get any sleep. (Tennis balls bounce really well off Mom's forehead at four in the morning!)

I'm pretty good at herding cats, too -- or at least Zaph, when he decides to make a break for it and escapes to the OUT.

A Trip Around the Block

2009-07-01T14:40:00.001-03:00

Please don't tell my cuzzins, Ella and Kiah, the Great Danes who want to eat me, but I was in their daddy's zoom-zoom today!

Nunkle Stephen came over to see Daddy (his brudder) and Mom (his partner in geocaching) and I made such a big fuss over him! I barked and danced, and when it was time for Nunkle Stephen to go, Daddy wanted to see if I'd go with him!

So Nunkle Stephen opened the door, and it was a long way up into the truck, but I hopped right up there! And Nunkle Stephen took me fur a drive around the block! Once he put down the window so I could stick my head out, I furgot all about Mom and Daddy! I was having fun!

(And I hope my evil cuzzins smelt me, too!)

Dog is My Co-Pilot

2009-06-28T22:23:00.000-03:00

We went fur drives again today! I'm really liking the fact that both hoomins have new cameras because they're always looking fur new things to take pitchures of! Today we went to a place called Black River (where the water was blue) and another place called Gardner Creek (but there were no gardeners in the creek, either).

Mom was looking for geocaches, too, of course, and at the beach at Gardner Creek, she made us walk FUREVER to get one. But it was okay because there were lotsa big rocks for me to zoom up and down! I like to pretend I'm a wonderdog sometimes and see how fast I can go up and down. (I'm much faster than Mom! She's pretty quick going up the rocks, when she's looking fur a cache, but then she can't figger out how to get back down! wagwagwag)

St. Andy's, Pocologan, and Nice Cream!

2009-06-19T21:17:00.001-03:00

I knew today was going to be a funfunfun day because Daddy didn't go to work! It was a work day for him, but he took the day off to spend with me! (Oh, and Mom, too.)

When I saw him getting my travel water bottle ready, I was so excited that I couldn't keep still!

We got in the car and drove down to St. Andy's, and walked on lotsa beaches there and in Pocologan. I got to sniff all kinds of wunnerful stinky things, and I rolled in all kinds of seaweed, too. I helped Daddy look for driftwood, and we both laughed at Mom who couldn't find as many geocaches as she wanted.

And the best part of all? We stopped in St. George and I GOT NICE CREAM!

I'm furry tired now, but I hope Daddy takes days off work more often! I like days with my Daddy. (Oh, and Mom, too.)

Learning a New Trick

2009-06-14T18:08:00.002-03:00

I'm trying to learn a new trick. Not fetch (because Mom says I'm a Fetch Machine!) but something furry different. I'm learning to become invisible!

Look! You can hardly see me at all!

They Say It's My Burpday!

2009-06-12T19:42:00.004-03:00

Hello, everydoggy! Today is my burpday! I'm officially two years old now.

Mom and Daddy helped with the sillybrations. We played fetch in the backyard 'til I got really, really wet, and then Daddy said he had a T*R*E*A*T for me. Well, I was hoping for nice cream, but burger mixed in with my suppertime is pretty good too!

Hope your burpdays are as good as mine!

Hello, everydoggy!

2009-06-06T08:13:00.005-03:00

Last night, Mom and Daddy tricked me a little bit. You see, Daddy got all smiley and said, "You wanna go to the VET?!" Well, that sounded like fun, so I tore down the stairs, we all got in the zoom-zoom and headed out.

Well, doggies, I have to tell you something. "VET" is not the same things as "PARK", "BEACH" or "CACHE". "VET" is hoomin-speak for TED (The Evil Doctor). So if your hoomins ask you if you want to go to "VET", just bark "NO!"

Now, acshully, my TED isn't all that bad. He's furry gentle and kind and I can tell he likes me. But he keeps poking me with things. Last night he boosted me with limes. I don't know what that means, exactly, but Mom says we can go romping in the woods now without worrying about being ticked off. Or something. I dunno. Hoomins are weird.

Yesterday I pulled a fast one on Daddy, too, so I guess we're even. On the table behind his pooter seat in his office, he had left some nummy clucky bones! Well, since he was busy looking at his pooter, I saw my chance! I furry quietly snuck up behind him and snatched the bones right from the plate! He never even noticed until he picked up the plate to throw them out! Mom's got a "stubbed-ub-node" (she says), so she didn't smell it on me, and thought it was my chewie she saw me carrying in my mouth.

Well, doggies, I ated the nummy clucky bones. And Daddy and Mom got mad at me and furry worried. TED said last night that I was probably okay, but I guess clucky bones are a no-no fur us doggies because they can splinter, or choke us. Too bad, because they tasted good! But I'll prolly never have them again because Daddy is being furry careful from now on, he says.

So that was my fun yesterday! Oh, and if the nice lady from TED's office is reading this right now, I'm sorry I wasn't furry friendly to you when I was leaving, but I had to get out of there! I was afraid TED was gonna boost me with lemons next. (wagwagwag)

There's a fine line between "brave" and "stoopid"...

2009-06-02T21:42:00.003-03:00

Mom has a new camera!

2009-05-31T10:03:00.002-03:00

Daddy sprized Mom with a new camera! You know what that means! Even more (and better) pictures of ME! (wagwagwag)

Some stoopid hoomins ...

2009-05-26T19:00:00.004-03:00

Dear Piper,

I write to you haven taken cognizance of the sensitive nature of this deal and thought carefully of a confidant that will assist me in the transaction. I have deemed it pertinent and appropriate to contact you directly for a prospective business deal in the tune of GBP34.3 million.

I am a Portfolio Manager with UBS financial services Inc, and I am ready and willing to work this deal out with your sincere assistance and cooperation. It will be unwise to jeopardize the success of this transaction at this point by releasing the details as I cannot confirm your exact stand till I receive your response to this email.

I will give you the full details of the transaction and how to go about it as soon as I confirm your positive response. Honesty, confidentiality and effective communication is highly needed to ensure prompt conclusion of this deal as this is risk-free and profitable.

Regards,
Stephen Spammer

Dear Stephen,

I am a dog.

Regards,
Piper

My Big Adventure! Part Four!

2009-05-17T22:49:00.004-03:00

After meeting the chief, it was time to leave Annie-go-fish and go home. I wasn't really looking forward to a long time in the zoom-zoom, but I knew my hoomins would make sure I didn't get too bored.

The first place we stopped was a cemetery at Glen Bard. Daddy took lots of pitchures of the gravemarkers, and Mom went looking for a geocache. I couldn't decide which hoomin was having more fun, so I ranranran back and forth between them.

After Glen Bard, we went to a place where they have another cairn. This one is to 'member a big battle in Scotland. We parked on the side of the road, walked around a gate, and then walked through the woods for a little while.

We got to the cairn and Mom stayed there to take pitchures, while Daddy decided to go down on the beach to look for driftwood. I decided to go with Daddy because the cairn wasn't exactly doing anything fun.

Well, I am so glad I went with Daddy! I found a BigBall! A souvenir all my own! MINE! I proudly carried it all the way back all by myself, and when I hopped in the zoom-zoom, it was in my mouth. (In fact, I haven't really let it go too far from me since we got home!)

The rest of the trip home was mostly uneventful.

I said "Mostly". When we got to a place called Oxford, Mom made us stop for a geocache. Well, it was right next to a giant man-eating blueberry! I did not like that thing one bit! I barked at it to go away, but it refused. Finally Daddy had to take me up to it so I could show it who was boss.
All in all, I had a really great adventure with my hoomins, but I'm glad to be home now. It was a very tiring trip to Annie-go-fish!

My Big Adventure! Part Three!

2009-05-17T21:43:00.010-03:00

Today was a furry busy day! Furst, we all got up early. Mom and Daddy put on their Maclean clothes, and I thought, Here we go again. Hoomins see the Chief, but not me. But then Mom did something really cool! She put some Maclean clothes on me too!

Mom wanted a family portrait at the brand-new Maclean cairn in Annie-go-fish, so that's where we went! Mom put the camera on a big spider-stick-thing, pressed a button, and ran to join me and Daddy.

In this pitchure, Daddy and I are wearing the Maclean of Duart Dress Tartan, and Mom's wearing the Maclean of Duart Hunting Tartan (although you can't see it furry well). Daddy's jacket is actually older than he is -- it was his daddy's!

I was hoping that the chief would be at the cairn when we got there, but no such luck. I was beginning to think I was never going to see the chief.

When we got back to the Not-Home, I was really kinda sad and happy all at the same time. Mom and Daddy started packing things up, and once I saw my travel bedtime get put into the zoom-zoom, I knew that we were going to go Home! No chief for Piper, I though to myself. But it turned out that we weren't quite done in Annie-go-fish yet.

First, Daddy and Mom took me to the Fetch Park for one last time. Even though there were people walking and kids playing, I only had eyes for Daddy and the ball!
After that, Daddy and I took Mom to get a couple of geocaches, then we all went to a food-place. Mom and Daddy went in and had cheeseburgers for breakfast, sitting in a window seat so that they could keep an eye on me in the zoom-zoom. (Daddy brought me out some hamburger bits again.)

After breakfast, we then went to a house. I thought it was a weird place for a geocache, but it turned out that Mom had other interests in Annie-go-fish!

There was a man, and a lady, and a little girl, and a Schnauzer named Sparky. The lady kinda smelled like Mom, and I found out it was cuz she was Mom's cuzzin, Wendy. That made the little girl (Morgan) and Sparky my cuzzins! I love meeting more family!

Cuzzin Wendy said that Sparky wasn't always friendly to other dogs, but we got along okay. I think he might've been a little jello-ous because I was getting along with his hoomins. After all, we're family!

Daddy said it was time to go, though, so Mom had him take a few more pictures and then we got into the zoom-zoom again. I settled in for what I thought was going to be a long drive, but next thing I know, daddy's stopping the car again.

Mom put on my Maclean clothes and we went back up to Cairn Park. At first I thought that maybe we were going to see the chief after all, but we were the only ones there. Not only that, but they must've been expecting rain, because the Maclean cairn was all covered up. Daddy and Mom were just kind of standing around, not doing anything. It was furry weird.

And then I heard them. Bagpipes!

The Macleans were coming!
All kinds of Macleans! All kinds of flags! All kinds of tartan! It was furry exciting! My entire body was wagging and people were pointing at me and saying, "There's Piper! She's so pretty in her Maclean tartan!"

And then I saw him! I saw the chief!

All the people came and gathered around the cairn, and it was uncovered, and then people took a lot of pitchures! There was a Sheltie there named Killie wearing the green Hunting tartan, and we chatted for a bit, and then Mom and Dad took me over to the cairn.

The chief came over. He patted me on the head and said, "I usually do not pose with dogs," which made me feel even more special!

He seemed like such a furry nice man.

I met the chief! And now my hunger strike was over! It was time to go home!

My Big Adventure! Part Two!

2009-05-16T23:11:00.006-03:00

Well, this morning was a furst. I got mad at my hoomins.

Fur months and months, they've been talking about going to see the Chief of Clan Maclean, and been sayin' that I'd get to see him, too. Well, I heard them talking this morning and they saw him last night. Without me!

So this morning I, Piper McLean, went on a hunger strike.

Daddy was worrying because I wasn't eating anything, so I decided to seize this opportunity to get him back fur not taking me to meet the Chief. I decided I wasn't going to eat anything until I got to meet the Chief. Take that, hoomins!

It was hard to stay mad at Daddy. After all, he did keep taking me to the park to play fetch.

He threw the ball over and over, far away for me to runrunrun and get, and then "way up" for me to catch on the first bounce. I love playing fetch! I just wish that Daddy unnerstood that when I flop over after Throw #37, it doesn't mean that I'm tired. I just need a little pause!

Today wasn't really furry exciting. Mom and Daddy were out all morning, then came back at lunch time. Daddy saw that I still hadn't eaten anything, and that was good. But when they came back from lunch, he got sneaky. Daddy put little pieces of hamburger in my dish. Before I knew what I was doing, the hamburger was gone!

Amendment: I, Piper McLean, am on a hunger strike, and will not eat anything until I meet the Chief of Clan Maclean. Unless it's hamburger. So there!

Mom stayed at the Not-Home with me fur the afternoon and we got in our usual nap. When Daddy came Not-Home at suppertime, he stirred up my kibble to see if that would make me eat. Nice try, Daddy.

Then Mom and Daddy got in their Maclean clothes and went out. I stayed Not-Home with Tug Toy and napped some more. Aside from the Fetch Park, Annie-go-fish is kinda boring.

Day Two of the Big Adventure to See the Chief, and I still haven't seen the Chief! But Mom and Daddy spent all day with him today! This is so unfair!

Not eating. Not eating! Nope ... unless there's a crumb of hamburger I missed ...

My Big Adventure! Part One!

2009-05-15T23:46:00.000-03:00

Life around here has been pretty boring. Mom was really busy, and Daddy's always really busy, and so nothing out of the ordinary was happening. I was still getting to the Bark Park to see my friends, and going for the occasion geocache with Mom, but nothing that would make for a good blog post!

Boy, did that change!

I knew something was up last night, when I saw that both Mom and Daddy were packing bags. When I saw Daddy take my travel bedtime to the back door, I got so excited, my entire body started wagging! This was it! The Big Adventure to see the Chief of Clan Maclean!

So this morning, Mom, Daddy and I all got into the car and set out for Annie-go-fish, Nova Scotia. Mom was wearing her beeping necklace, so I knew that we'd be stopping for some geocaches along the way. I really like geocaching because it means I get to go somewhere I've never been before, and sniff new things!

The first geocache we stopped at was kinda boring for me. It was just a bunch of rocks. And they weren't even good rocks. I like rocks that are round and easy to carry, like a ball. These rocks were sharp and pointy and boring. Mom and Daddy were all excited about the rocks, though. They kept saying that the rocks in the hill were really trees. Silly hoomins. There is a big difference between rocks and trees! Then they started looking at the sharp, pointy rocks on the ground. And then I saw what they were saying -- the rocks had pitchures in them! That was inneresting, but still ... I like rocks I can carry.

The next place we stopped was a fun place! I got to get out and run-run-run in the muddy grass and make Daddy worry about how dirty I was gonna get! There was a bridge there with a roof on it (or a house sitting over the river, missing two walls? I'm not sure) and I got to help Daddy take pitchures. (By the way, Daddy -- I know you don't like having your pitchure taken, but you'd do just about ennything fur me, right? blink-blink--blink-blink)

I didn't like the next one at all! Mom and Daddy have this weird fascination with big things that are going to eat them. I just don't unnerstand. I bark and bark and warn them, but they still get too close fur my comfort. But these ones were okay. I checked them out to make sure.

Mom said I looked like I fit right in. I dunno what she meant.

We stopped a few more times along the way to Annie-go-fish, like in Am-merst, where Mom wanted to go look at rug stuff, and a few places where Daddy wanted me to pee. I got a few French fries, too, but nothing too exciting. It was just a long drive that took furever.

Finally we got to Annie-go-fish and got settled into our Not-Home. It was kind of a weird place. There was a big bed, and a room with a bath in it, and that was about it. But Daddy had heard about a place to play fetch, and so I was happy. It was a really big park and Daddy would throw my ball as far as he possibly could, and I could runrunrun to get it.

After fetch, though, Mom and Daddy get dressed up in their Maclean clothes, put "At the End of My Leash" on the non-smelly-pitchure-box, and left me all alone in the Not-Home. This really bothered me fur about thirty-seven seconds, until I fell asleep.

They came home again after not too long, and then they went out to get get food at one of Daddy's fave-rit places from when he was in unifurcity.

After they brought it back and ate it,and they gave me a little bit too, we all went to bed. The big bed was nice, 'cuz there was room for all three of us to not touch if we didn't wanna.

It was a furry long day!

It was a GOOD Friday!

2009-04-10T20:49:00.013-03:00

Oh my DOG! Today was such a wunnerful day that I don't even know where to begin! I guess I'll begin at the beginning!

First of all, it was such a surprise! Even though it's Friday, Daddy didn't get up when the alarm went off. (Mom got up, because she always does, but not Daddy.)

At first I thought he was sick, so I stayed with him instead of going into Mom's office. But he wasn't sick -- he was just sleepin' in! I was afraid he'd be late for work, so I pounced on him and stuff and made him get up. He played tug-toy with me, and then told me it was Good Friday and he didn't have to leave me today. Any day that my daddy stays with me is a Good Efurryday, I say!

Before long, Daddy went into Mom's office. Next thing I knew, Mom was getting dressed, and Daddy was brushing his fangs, and something was definitely going on. And then I saw Daddy pick up my travel water bottle. "You want to go on an Adventure?" he asked. Oh, boy -- did I!

So we got in the Car and drove fur a long time. Mom had her beepy necklace on, so I thought we were going caching. But no! We went to The Summer Place, which is really funny, because it's still winter! The lane had snow too, so we parked on the edge of the road and started walking down. Daddy said he needed to get some rocks for a cairn for Clan Maclean (which Sir Lachlan's gonna unveil or something), and alla Macleans are supposed to bring rocks from their special places.So Daddy got his rock from The Summer Place while Mom took some pitchures in the woods, and then we walked back up to the car. I smelled some deer poop and chewed on some sticks along the way, because I thought that this was the end of our adventure and I wanted to get the most out of it.
But when we got back in the car, Daddy went a different way than I thought he would! And I got serious waggy-butt at that!

Daddy said we were going to Big Beach, which is what he and Nunkle Stephen and all the other brudders and sisters called it when they were growing up. But the offishul name is "McLean's Beach", named after Daddy's Daddy and his Daddy and stuff.

It was only a short drive from The Summer Place, but we had to slow right down cuzza these:
Mom and Daddy took lotsa pictures of them and then we went exploring on the beach. Daddy wanted to get another rock fur the cairn, so I got to look around and sniff and stuff. The lake was still hard in places, but nice and wet near where we were. I wanted to go in, but Daddy said, "NO!" so I didn't. I just looked.
Then we got back in The Car, and I thought fur sure that we were done, but no! Daddy didn't take the Home Road, but instead we went to a place called Black's Harbour. It's a little village where Daddy's Daddy grew up, and it's where you get the Big Boat to Grand Manan (a place Mom says she's going to take me soon). We drove around a lot, and next thing I knew, we were at a little beach!
It was a furry special beach, because efurry time a wave came in, you could hear a little moosical tinkling sound. Mom's gonna call it "Tinkling Beach" from now on. The sound is made by all the beach glass that's along the edge of the water. Mom filled up her pockets as much as she could, and Daddy found stuff too, and I got to sniff, and go in, and all that fun stuff. And then people came and I got to say hi to them too! No wonder they call it the Bay of Fun-Day!

[Mom note: That's "Bay of Fundy", Piper.]

So when we got back in the car, I really wasn't sure where we were going, because this Big Adventure was even bigger than I'd dared to hope! And, sure enough, as we were going back along the road to home, Mom started looking at her beepy necklace, and saying the magic words: "Three hundred metres, two-seventy, slow down, two-fifty ..."

We were going fur a geocache!

We found the cache pretty quickly -- it was hidden under some logs -- and then Mom took a picture of me watching her sign the log fur both of us. By the time we got back to Daddy and the car, Mom noticed that I wasn't racing around like I usually do. In fact, I was pretty tuckered out! As soon as we started down the highway again, I laid down on My Seat to rest. (Mom couldn't believe it, so she took this pitchure with her cell phone as F-E-Dense.)
We came home and then we took a nap and then we got up. It was a wunnerful day.

I like Good Fridays. I hope tomorrow is Good Saturday! (wagwagwag)

A plan ...

2009-04-05T10:35:00.009-03:00

Daddy and Mom keep talking about us all getting into the C-A-R and going on a Big Adventure next month!

They said we're going to Antigonish (I hadda look that one up!) to a conference for Clan Maclean. I guess it's going to be a lot of fun.

But there's a problem. Because I walk on four legs and not two, I might not be allowed to go in the buildings at the unifurcity. Daddy is looking into doggie day care for when the meetings are, but I really want to go with Mom and Daddy.

You see, it's not just because I love to be with my humans 24/7. It's because Sir Lachlan, the Chief of Clan Maclean, is going to be there! The real chief! And I want to meet him and sniff him, because he's kinda like the King of the Macleans! And I'm a Maclean! Daddy said so!

So Mom came up with this Offishul Identity Card, in the hopes that it would get me into the unifurcity buildings. I wonder if we could get Sir Lachlan to sign it?

If not, Plan B involves Daddy using a white cane and dark sunglasses, he says.

Spring Fever

2009-04-03T14:14:00.003-03:00

Mom didn't get called to substitoot teach today, so after Daddy went to work, we took a little nap. That nap didn't last very long, though, because we both need to get OUTside! We've got spring fever!

So Mom got my water bottle and the leash and we went up to the Park! Ohmydog, I was so excited! She kept me on the leash while we walked past the gate and up the road, but when we got to the Bark Park parking lot, Mom unhooked me! And then from her pocket, she brought the tennis ball and the pocket ball-launcher!

After I ran and fetched the ball about ten times, Mom noticed that Jack (a Nova Scotia Duck Toller) and his mom were actually all by themselves in the Bark Park! So naturally we had to go see them!

Once we got inside though, I made Mom throw the ball. It was nice to see Jack, but GIMME THE BALL! So even though toys in the Bark Park are against the rules, it was just us and Jack and his mom, so Mom threw the ball for me -- over and over and over. Finally I was so tired, I had to lie down for a bit before bringing it back!

After the Bark Park, Mom took me to see Daddy at his work, and then we came home. Now that I've finally blogged for you again after a furry long time (please accept my pawlogies), I think I'm going to go pass out next to Mom's feet now!

I learned a new word today.

2009-02-23T11:07:00.008-04:00

(Well, acshully, I learned a lot of really special words from Mom when she looked out the window, but I'm not 'llowed to tell you those ones.)

The new word I learned today was: BLIZZARD.

I like "blizzard". It means, first of all, that Mom stays home with me because the schools are closed. (Acshully, according to the voicebox, it sounds like everything is closed.) But the best part about "blizzard" is that it means a LOT of snow!

Daddy let me help him shovel a path to the road after he shoveled a path for me to go to my back OUT. He threw snowballs for me and I chased them, but it was furry hard because the snow was up over my head! "Blizzard" must also mean "big party in the neighbourhood", because efurryone was out shoveling all at the same time!
After Daddy went to work, Mom took me to my back OUT and we played! It was hard going, but we all know that if there's a tennis ball, I'm gonna get it!

Why Blogging is Good.

2009-02-15T12:17:00.003-04:00

No sooner did I blog about how bored I was, Daddy and Mom got their coats on and told me we were going in the zoom-zoom. First Mom went into the place that eats her money, but then we went to The Park!

It was so much fun! We walked up by the Bark Park and there was a mastiff, a Boxer, and two terror-poos, and I saw a Golden through the trees. There were hoomins who said hello and Daddy told me I was a good girl, and there was HORSE POOP! Can you say "heaven"?!

Mom and Daddy had a nice walk, too. They threw snowballs and I chased them and it was so much fun!
My hoomins are pretty good to me. And apparently they read my blog, too.

Bored.

2009-02-15T09:33:00.002-04:00

I know I've been furry quiet lately, everydoggy, but there's just nothing going on. Mom's working just about every day and so she's not geocaching, and then when she isn't working, she says it's too icy to go anywhere.

(sigh)

At least Zaph lets me chew on him once in awhile. He's getting fat, too, so he's easier to catch.

I can't wait until winter is over. I love the snow, but I'm getting tired of just playing in the yard. A girl's gotta sniff things!

Snow Dog

2009-02-07T13:57:00.002-04:00

Yesterday, Daddy took me in the zoom-zoom up to the park. We parked at the locked gate and then walked up past the Bark Park, a long ways. It was so much fun! He let me run and jump, and dig in the snow.

I love hanging out with my Daddy, and I think he kinda likes me too.

2009-01-29T17:58:00.001-04:00

Happy Funday!

2009-01-25T10:37:00.003-04:00

Fangu, efurrybody, who asked about my Mom. She's furry sore today (says she feels like she tried to haul an 18-wheeler up a hill), but it's dull, achy hurts, not brand-new broken hurts.

Mom has tomorrow and the next day off, so maybe we can go caching then.

In the meantime, I'm just going to continue looking after Mom like I did last night. (I was worried she'd overheat when she was sleeping, so I took all the covers away and made sure she couldn't get them back!)

Daddy says that today is Rub Yer Burns Day, and that since I'm a Scottish dog (both a McLean and a Border Collie), that I have to sillybrate. I don't have any burns, though, and I really don't think rubbing burns is a good idea. (Maybe Daddy is mixed up.)

On the other paw, maybe it's really Rub Yer Belly Day. Now that's a sillybration I can really get into!

Just call me Lassie!

2009-01-24T12:17:00.003-04:00

I was so excited! Mom had her geocaching bag with her and a list, and when she was putting on her boots, she said to me, "Do you wanna go caching?"

Well, since "caching" usually means walking in woods I've never sniffed before, I did my doggy dance of joy! Mom got my water bottle and leash and harness, and we got all ready, and then we went out the front door!

I did my usual "stay" while Mom headed down to the car. (In snow-times Mom and Daddy park on the street because the driveway is too steep.) Well, a really weird thing happened! Mom was walking down the steps and her feet flew out and she sat down real hard, shoulder and arm first!

Mom had told me to stay, but she was right there, so I ran over to see what she was doing and the truth was, she wasn't doing much. So I ran to our front door to try to get Daddy! I barked at the front door and it musta worked, because Daddy came out!

I rescued my Mom! I did it! While she was sitting there on the wet ice, not moving except talking on her little machine, Daddy musta heard me and came out to save her!

I'm a little disappointed that we didn't get to go caching, but Daddy said I can go-in-car with him to get salt (whatever that is). Mom told him she's gonna wait to see if she needs to go to the horse-piddle, but I don't know if I can go there or not.

I really wanted to go caching, but Mom just gave me a Jerky Treat, so I guess that'll do fur now.

Kissmoose Summary

2008-12-31T00:33:00.011-04:00

Hello, everydoggy! Mom has finally stepped away from the pooter long enough to let me post some pictures of our wonderdog Kissmoose! (She got Sims 2 stuff for Kissmoose and pretty much hasn't gotten out of her pooter chair since!)
Daddy was really amazed that Mom slept in until 8:30 AM. Last Kissmoose she woke up at 4 AM and then paced and paced until 7 AM. This year I was the one who had to wake them up! When I got downstairs, I was so excited to see that Santa Claws had come! Zaph was so excited, he decided to climb the tree!
Mom and Daddy got pressies too, but they weren't nearly as inneresting as mine! There was a whole bag of pressies for me and Zaph, and after Mom and Daddy emptied their big funny-looking socks, they finally got a gift out for me!

Santa Claws must not unnerstand that I don't have 'posable thumbs, because he used too much tape for me to get the opening started. Luckily Daddy loves me. (wag)
There were a lot of presents for me! Besides the T*R*E*A*T*S I got from Mom's work Secret Santa and from Grammy and Grampy, Santa brought me lotsa stuff too! I got a rawhide stick (Daddy calls it my cigar), salmon T*R*E*A*T*S that are so deliciously stinky that they make both Mom and Daddy run for cover, a sheepyskin squeaky toy, and a rawhide ring! There might be more -- it was a bare-ass-ment of riches! (They wouldn't let me steal Zaph's catnip mice, though.)
The absolute bestest thing about Kissmoose, though, is that both Mom and Daddy are home with me. We go for walks and take naps and go in the zoom-zoom, and all kinds of other good stuff.

If 2009 is even half as good as 2008 was for me, I'm going to be a very happy doggy indeed!

Happy Nude Ears, everydoggy!

It's a Wonderdog Day!

2008-12-21T15:12:00.006-04:00

Mom and Daddy took me for a drive today!

First, we went to the West Side so Mom could log her 100th Geocache Find. After that, we went to a local little mall, and Mom and Daddy even took turns going in the store so I wouldn't get lonely.

After that, though, was the BESTEST part, because we went up to Rockwood Park. There was no one really around, so Dad let me stay off the leash as we walked along the closed-for-winter driving trail. I ran and I jumped and I chased snowballs and I had the most WONDERDOG time!

Here are some pictures so you can see how much fun I had! To see larger versions, just click on them. (If you look closely in the last picture, you can see my GeoDog coin on my collar. It's so that geocachers can log that they've met me.)

Then we went to the corner store, and it was really weird. They now have a forest in the place for the cars. Mom and Daddy got out of our car and looked at one tree and then gave a man some treat-papers (like the papers Mom uses at the Yum-Yum store).

And then we came home! And now we're gonna nap! It doesn't get any better than this!

Dear Santa Claws

2008-12-20T23:29:00.002-04:00

I would like many more toys like this one here. It is almost indestructible and no matter how hard we play tug with it, it has not yet fallen apart.

Tug Toy (this toy) is my favourite toy these days. It's best when, after I smoosh it into their faces sixteen times, Mom or Daddy finally get the hint and grab it and pull. I growl and snarl and sound furry furocious.

And yes, I've been a good girl. I even let go of it when they tell me to. So there.

Time with Mom

2008-11-21T15:55:00.003-04:00

Mom has been spending all day yesterday and all day today with me! (Well, Zaph is here too, but he doesn't count.) Mom has a couple of days off because there's no school for the students, so we've been getting reacquainted.

Yesterday was truly wonderdog! We spent all day together!

First we drove out to the junkyard to get a new-ish visor for The Car (since ours fell off), and then Mom took me to the Yum-Yum store! She let me pick out my own T*R*E*A*T*S and efurrything! And I got a new hard rubber ball, too, that Mom says sounds like an amourous moose when I chomp it hard enough.

Then we napped. No one can nap like my mom. She let me snuggle right beside her and sleep with my head on her shoulder. And after our nap, we went to the Car-Fixer and I got to sit and wait with Mom, and efurryone said what a Good Girl I was.

After that, we went up to the Bark Park and I got to romp and play for almost an hour with my five-month Boxer pal named Zander. In short, yesterday rocked!

Today we've been napping a lot. Mom's getting bronk-eye-tiss, so she's been furry warm, and making lots of barking noises, but she still plays tug with me.

All is right in my world. (wagwagwag)

Wrapping Gifts with Cats - from Zaphod

2008-11-17T07:43:00.004-04:00

Piper's not up yet, so I've decided to be a guest-blogger since she has left you for so long. ... NO, PIPER, I AM NOT HIJACKING YOUR BLOG! NOW STOP TRYING TO GET OUT OF THE WASHER!

... Ahem.

Purrs,
Zaphod

WRAPPING GIFTS WITH CATS

1. Clear large space on table for wrapping present.

2. Go to closet and collect bag in which present is contained, and close door.

3. Open door and remove cat from closet.

4. Go to cupboard and retrieve rolls of wrapping paper.

5. Go back and remove cat from cupboard.

6. Go to drawer and collect transparent sticky tape, ribbons, scissors, labels, etc.

7. Lay out present and wrapping materials on table, to enable wrapping strategy to be formed.

8. Go back to drawer to get string, remove cat that has been in the drawer since last visit, and collect string.

9. Remove present from bag.

10. Remove cat from bag.

11. Open box to check present, remove cat from box, replace present.

12. Lay out paper to enable cutting to size.

13. Cut the paper to size, trying to keep the cutting line straight.

14. Throw away first sheet because cat tried to chase the scissors and tore paper.

15. Cut second sheet of paper to size by putting cat in the bag the present came out of.

16. Place present onto now-properly-sized paper.

17. Lift up edges of paper to seal in present, wonder why edges now don't reach, and find cat between present and paper. Remove cat and retry.

18. Place object on paper, to hold in place, while cutting transparent sticky tape.

19. Spend next 20 minutes carefully trying to remove transparent sticky tape from cat with pair of nail scissors.

20. Seal paper down with transparent sticky tape, making corners as neat as possible.

21. Look for roll of ribbon; chase cat down hall and retrieve ribbon.

22. Try to wrap present with ribbon in a two-directional turn.

23. Re-roll up ribbon and remove paper that is now torn, due to cat's enthusiasm in chasing ribbon.

24. Repeat steps 12-22 until down to last sheet of paper.

25. Decide to skip steps 12-16 in order to save time and reduce risk of losing last sheet of paper. Retrieve old cardboard box that you know is right size for sheet of paper.

26. Put present in box, and tie down with string.

27. Remove string, open box and remove cat.

28. Put all packing materials in bag with present and head for lockable room.

29. Once inside room, lock door and start to re-lay out packing materials.

30. Remove cat from box, unlock door, put cat outside door, close door and re-lock.

31. Lay out last sheet of paper. (Admittedly this is difficult in the small area of the bathroom, but try your best!)

32. Seal box, wrap with paper and start repairs by very carefully sealing down tears with transparent sticky tape. Now tie up with ribbon and decorate with bows to hide worst affected areas.

33. Label, then sit back and admire your handiwork, congratulating yourself on making good of a bad job.

34. Unlock door, and go to kitchen to make drink and feed cat.

35. Spend next 15 minutes looking for cat, before coming to obvious conclusion.

36. Unwrap present, untie box and remove cat.

37. Retrieve all discarded sheets of wrapping paper, feed cat and retire to lockable room for last attempt, making certain you are alone and the door is locked.

38. At time of handing over present, smile sweetly at receiver's face, as they try and hide their contempt at being handed such a badly wrapped present.

39. Vow to yourself that next year, you will get the store to wrap the thing for you.

No worries!

2008-11-03T15:01:00.003-04:00

The Pretty Lady Vet called Mom this morning with the results of my little buggy friend from a few weeks ago.

The tick was the bad kind, a black-legged (deer) tick, but it didn't have Lyme Disease, and so neither do I! (wagwagwag)

Mom is resting her ankle and trying to write, but her naps keep getting in the way. I slide under the covers and snuggle up close. She's warm, and snores.

Romping Through the Woods

2008-11-02T10:38:00.004-04:00

Hello, everydoggy!

We just got home from walking through the woods. I got to run and play and eat lots of sticks! Mom and Daddy were worried about taking me in case I got another tick, but the ground was hard and cold, and they think the ticks are asleep fur the winter. (Daddy checked me over really good when we got home, though.)

Mom has become really crazy about looking fur plastic boxes in the woods. She has this thing that she wears around her neck and she goes where it tells her to go. I could tell her where to go (BARK PARK!) but she doesn't listen to me.

Yesterday, though, she slipped and fell down a wet grassy slope, and her ankle went snap-snap. She can still walk on it, but we only went to find one plastic box today because it started hurting her really bad. (I keep telling my hoomins that walking on four legs gives you more stability, but do they listen?)

Now Mom's sulking, which means a nap soon! (wagwagwag)

She Didn't Furget About Me After All.

2008-10-29T11:36:00.008-03:00

Hello, doggies! I have been furry busy being Velcro-Dog to Mom ever since she came home. It turns out that she wasn't lost at all, but that Ont Krista in Halifax needed her, so she went down to help.

Ont Krista must've felt bad for Mom being away from me, because she took Mom to the most wonderdog little shop! It's a bakery! For dogs!

Mom was furry excited when she saw all of the wonderdog things there, and she told the clerk that she really wished I was there with her. Then I could have picked out my own treats! She said that it would almost be worth listening to me whining in the car fur the five-hour drive just so I could visit this place.

Mom couldn't possibly leave such a wonderdog bakery without at least something fur me. It took her a long time to pick, but she settled on this jar of treats.

I love them so much that I'd eat the whole jar if she'd let me! (wagwagwag)

Besides getting treats, I'm glad I've got Mom back. Although she takes up a lot of room on the bed, we missed her.

Maybe I can go too next time and see Ont Krista and Cuzzin Emily (and the BAKERY!) fur myself. (wagwagwag)

MOM'S HOME!

2008-10-28T15:01:00.001-03:00

And she brought me treats!

More later after a thorough sniffing and a cuddle-nap!

I think Mom is lost.

2008-10-26T16:55:00.002-03:00

Mom and Daddy both left at the same time yesterday. They were gone long enough for me to have a nice nap. But then Daddy came back -- without Mom! And Mom's zoom-zoom is gone.

I am very confused, but at least I can have Mom's half of the bed without her protesting now.

Goin' Buggy ...

2008-10-14T13:14:00.003-03:00

Last night, Mom and Daddy noticed I brought home a little hitchhiker from our walk in the woods on Sunday.

I'll let Mom explain on her blog.

I went to see the Pretty Lady Vet this morning and hopefully when the hitchhiker gets tested, everything will be okay.

In the meantime ... has anyone got a TENNIS BALL?!

Bestest Weekend This Week!

2008-10-12T19:11:00.006-03:00

Wow! We've been so busy today! Mom and I started geocaching at 7:30 this morning, stayed out for three hours, came home and napped, and then went out again!

Daddy came with us the second time and I got to do lots of walking in the woods.

Mom and Dad kept saying how pretty the leaves were.

I dunno about that, but they tasted good.

A Momentimous Occasion

2008-10-09T20:54:00.003-03:00

Tonight, Mom and I graduated from the Intro to Agility class at ARFF.

We did our very first full course, a Jumpers course, and we finished all 18 elements in about a minute and twenty-three seconds. I don't know why Mom was in such a rush when there was so much yummy horse poop to smell!

I am very proud of Mom because she tried really hard to keep up with me, but towards the end, her ass-maw started acting up (and she'd furgotten to bring her puffer with her to use beforehand).

Daddy made a video fur posterior's sake. Enjoy!

Eating bark off the stick?

2008-09-28T21:51:00.001-03:00

Why would you think I'd ever do that?

A Wonderdog Week!

2008-09-27T09:45:00.010-03:00

Sorry it has been a little while since I updated everydoggy. It has been a wonderdog week, though!

Last Saturday, Mom put me in the car and we drove west. At first, I thought we were going to my old PLV (Pretty Lady Vet), but we drove past it and then stopped at Sheldon's Point Park. There we met Scouter-Bill and we went geocaching! Mom had always wanted to try that, so when Scouter-Bill said he was going, Mom said she wanted to go too. And since it was an outdoorsy thing, she decided to bring me along! We were out walking for about three hours and we really had fun!

Since then, Mom and I have gone geocaching by ourselves a few times (even this morning in the rain!) and although she gets a little frustrated when I want to look at something else while she's looking in the bushes, we have fun together!

On Chewsday, Daddy came home from work early and took me for a walk in the woods up near the university. (When Mom got home, she asked me if I found the geocaches up that way, but I had to tell her no. My GPS -- the Good Piper Sniffer -- only works for food!)

We had a really good time walking. I love spending time with my daddy in the woods. I love to run and check things out as much as possible.

Then on Thursday, we had Jillity! We couldn't go last week because my foot was hurt and Mom had a migraine, so Mom was worried we'd be a little bit behind. But considering I hadn't even seen the dogwalk before, and that the A-frame was flat on the ground last time I saw it, we did really well!

We have to work on our homework this week, too. Mom has taught me to "touch", but now we have to work on "target". (None of the doggies in my group last week could do it, so I didn't feel quite so bad.)

My very favourite pieces of equipment, though, are the chute and the tunnel. Mom was a little worried that I'd be afraid of the chute, since I couldn't see where I was going, but Daddy had a good point: I sleep under the covers! I don't poking my way forward until I find my way out.

Daddy tried to take some video of me doing Jillity but the camera didn't want to cooperate, and then all the dust got in the way. Here is a video capture of me going over the A-frame so you can see I really did do it! And here is the video (Daddy put it on YouTube).

Oh, and before I furget -- fangu for all the good thoughts and ritchewals for healing my foot. I'm all done the Annie-Buy-Oddics, and I see the new PLV (Pretty Lady Vet) on Monday for the "all-bedder-now". (Mom says I'm also going to get shot. Or something like that.)

Black and White and Red All Over ...

2008-09-13T18:57:00.002-03:00

So, I was just fetching the tennis ball in the backyard, but when I brought it back to Daddy, he got very worried because there was all this red stuff coming out of my pretty front right paw. I wasn't sure why he was worried, but he called Mom and she came running and the two of them fussed over me (always a wonderdog thing).

Daddy wiped up the red stuff and Mom called the vet's emergency answering service. While talking with the on-call Pretty Lady Vet (PLV), Mom looked at my foot some more and then hung up.

I didn't catch a lot of what Mom said on the phone beyond "paw", "broken", and "do-claw". So I guess I'm supposed to do something with my claw. Or else I wasn't supposed to do something with my "don't-claw". I dunno. I was too busy running around, wagging my tail.

So Mom went out and came back with this white soft stuff that she wrapped around my pretty foot, hiding all the red fur, and then taped it on with special "sir-Jick-Al" tape. I was very interested in undoing all of her handiwork and kept pulling on the edges. Daddy said I might need Duck-Tape but he didn't have any.

I'm leaving it alone now, mostly (and we're getting a lot of practice at "leave it", Mom says), but it's very weird to have something covering up part of my foot. I don't like it -- at all. I guess it has to stay on until I go see my PLV on Monday. That's what the PLV on the phone told Mom, anyway.

So now I'm going to go nap with Daddy and see if I can get this thing off without him noticing. And if I can't, and I get bored, I'll just stick my tongue in his ear. He likes those kissies so much, he jumps right up!

PS -- When Mom came home from doing some work today, she found Daddy making jillity equipment in the kitchen! He said to her, "It's your fault. You left me all alone." I love my daddy! He's the bestest.

Jillity!

2008-09-11T21:38:00.006-03:00

Ohhhh, what fun we had tonight!

Mom and Dad and I got in the car and went for a drive out to a big place with GIANT dogs with hooves. There were lots of other doggies there, too, including some I knew from Oh Be Dense and my furends Dara and Charlie from the Bark Park. But I wasn't allowed to play with any of them. I was only allowed to play with Mom.

But there were some REALLY cool big toys for us to play with, like ladders and jumps and tunnels and tires ...

First we did the chute, and then the tunnel. I was a bit afraid at first, but once Mom showed me it was okay (and waved my red tuggy bone at me), then I went through. The tunnel was sneaky and kept get longer each time, but Mom was always there cheering me on, so I was a brave doggy and ran through anyway.

The tire was probably one of the easiest ones for me to do. After the tunnel, it was a piece of cake!

Dad took some pictures of me at all of the stations, but it was dark and dusty in the training stable, so a lot of the pictures didn't turn out so well. (They were too dark without the flash, and with the flash on, the flash lit up all the dust.)

I love how they chose our groups, and that they put me with the other herding doggies (The Aussies and Border Collies group ruled!). Chase and I are probably going to be buddies, like his mom said, and I liked the dog in front of me in line too.

Mom and I really had a good time tonight. I think that Dad is worried that the dust in the stable is going to make Mom sick (she has ass-maw), but Mom doesn't really care. She says she and I are going to have a lot of fun at this.

Tonight she told me she was really proud of me for trusting her and trying all of the scary new things even though I was nervous.

I can't wait to go back next week! I love Jillity!

Graduation!

2008-09-07T15:01:00.003-03:00

Wow, doggies! Mom worked so hard and I'm so proud of her. She graduated from Oh Be Dense this afternoon. She got the knack of walking beside me and doling out the treats, and walking away from me lying down on my red mat.

Now we can sit back and relax and laze around and do nothing! ... What, Mom? ... Whaddaya mean we have more school?!

Apparently we start Jillity classes this week.

Raising a hoomin sure is hard work!

I'm a Ball-Fetching Machine!

2008-08-30T10:34:00.013-03:00

Mom and I just got home a few minutes ago from the Bark Park. It was awesome, doggies! We were there for about two hours and I made Mom throw the ball almost the whole time! (She says she's going to take me out to the golf course sometime to see if she can wear me out.)
We went up to see Auntie Ferne and Cuzzin Rigby, a handsome greyhound, who are moving back to Toronto tomorrow. Rigby's girlfriend, Tia, and her family were also there, and it was fun playing with them, too.

Besides Tia, I also met Charlie (a Rottie-Golden mix) and Jonesy (a kinda scaredy Airedale) today, and lot of other doggies were there too. Even my handsome Casey (who came twice -- but I pretty much ignored him because he wasn't yellow and spherical).

Auntie Ferne couldn't believe that I could just keep going and going after the ball. Even Mom was surprised, but because it was early in the day, it wasn't too hot out.

Two other greyhounds, two brothers named Moxie and Maddox, came and it was like a big ol' greyhound reunion. I sniffed them a bit, but since I'd already met them before (and they weren't yellow and spherical), I mostly just kept chasing the ball.

Greyhounds have this stereotype of being high-energy dogs, but Auntie Ferne says that Rigby go-go-goes for about fifteen minutes and then he's done. Well, I must've been rubbing off on him today, because he was still playing a bit when it was time to go.

Keebo came with his parents today too, and we played together some. We've come a long way since the first night we met -- I like him much better now! (His parents' good manners are rubbing off on him.)
I just wish he'd get it into his big furry head that I'm not that kind of girl, and putting the moves on me when I have the ball in my mouth doesn't mean he's any more likely to get anywhere. Oh well. I'll just keep showing him my Big Girl Teeth until he finally clues in.

Well, Daddy is saying something about Going For a Drive, so I think I'd better go make sure I get to go too! (wagwagwag)

Look what Mom made for me!

2008-08-27T19:23:00.002-03:00

The last couple of times Mom has been at the Bark Park, she's been looking for a pen and some paper so she can give other hoomins the address to my blog. So the other night when we got home, when Daddy suggested she make me "business cards", she finally decided to do it.

It's a good thing she did something nice, because I'm a little mad at her right now. I've had her home all summer, only having to share her with Zaph. (And since he caught the mouse yesterday, she's kind of been patting him with a ten-foot-pole. I think The Mighty Hunter grossed her out.)

Well, this morning Mom got up, got dressed, and put on The Noisy Shoes. Now, I remember The Noisy Shoes -- they mean she's going to be gone for a long time. And sure enough, she was! ALL DAY! Who was I supposed to nap with? Zaph?! I don't think so.

Even worse, when she finally got home after work, she didn't take me to the Bark Park! I tried to tell her that it was time, but she either ignored me or just didn't get it. She threw my ball in the back yard for a while, but then she went back out again!

This is unacceptable.

I think I'll eat The Noisy Shoes.

It's not Sunday -- It's FUNday!

2008-08-24T16:33:00.005-03:00

Wow, doggies! Today has been absolutely wonderdog and it isn't even suppertime yet!

First of all, today was my second session of Oh-Be-Dense, and it went pretty good. Mom is still hacking like a forty-year-chain-smoker every time she moves, so Daddy was my handler today and Mom watched instead.

Because it wasn't a new place anymore, I didn't bark like last time, so I didn't get put in the corner. Daddy and I did some more chair-circling -- he's better at doling out the treats than Mom -- and I was much calmer today.

Class went really well. I just got really confused (and kinda bored). You see, I come when Daddy calls me. I sit, and I stay, until he tells me it's okay to come to him. I do this all the time -- even at the Bark Park -- so I'm pretty darn good at it. Well, today in class, we were working on recalls. She Who Must Be Obeyed (the instructor) set up like a tunnel of chairs to contain us canines, and then one by one she would hold our long leads until our hoomins (at the other end of the "chair-tunnel") would say come.

Well, the leash and the chairs were kind of weird, not to mention having someone I don't really know yet hold me and keep me from my daddy! So I did okay, but I think Mom, Daddy and me were all just itching to show them all what I can REALLY do! I don't wanna show off (well, okay, maybe I do) but I felt kinda dumb today because of trying to figure out all the extra stuff I don't usually use.

After class, we stopped home for a minute, then went to A Store because Mom needed to pick up a long lead for me. I was a little concerned because I thought Daddy got lost when driving the car. He'd put the Big Jug of Water in the car when we left home, so I knew we were going to go to the Bark Park, but then he drove right by it! But no worries -- we went to the Bark Park after the store instead. (Daddy wasn't lost after all.)

It's always so much fun at the Bark Park. Today was a little confusing because there was a Boxer there with my name, so I thought her hoomins were calling me. Brodie came a little later and we wrestled for a little bit. But the funniest part, especially if you ask the hoomins, was watching Odin and Jalapeno.

I always thought Odin didn't want to play with me because I was too small for him (he's a Great Dane). But I don't think that's it at all. I think I'm too big!

Odin and Jalapeno absolutely loved playing together today. I tried to play with them too, a little bit, but they only were interested in being best buddies. In fact, when Jap's mom tried to put the leash on him because it was time to go, Odin kept butting her hand out of the way because he didn't want Jalapeno to leave!

Finally, Odin's mom had to straddle him and hold on to his harness with both hands, looking like she was gonna ride him like in the rodeo, and Jalapeno's mom picked him up and ran.

Odin watched sadly as Jalapeno's family left the Bark Park and headed back to their car. He tried playing with a Chihuahua whose name I don't nose yet, but it just wasn't the same. He wanted his little buddy back.

That's why I love the Bark Park so much. Most of the time, all the doggies get along so great together, and if there's a problem, the hoomins take care of it right away.

Odin and Jalapeno proved it today: friendship comes in all sizes.

It's Our Annifursary!

2008-08-22T20:18:00.003-03:00

It's hard to believe it's been a whole year since Mom chose me at the shelter and brought me to my furever home! A year ago today, I went on a big car ride, got really good at being car-sick, and learned that Mom would love me anyway.

In the past year, I have gotten over the car-sickness. I have learned to sit and stay, and how to herd Zaphod the cat if he makes a break for it out the back door.

I have learned how to get under the covers and sleep next to Mom's knees, that ear-wax tastes yummy if only the hoomins would stay still, and that the Bark Park is a great place to meet friends.

Best of all, I have learned how to train hoomins to throw a tennis ball over and over and over again, so I can race through the back yard to bring it back.

Happy 'Doption Day to me and my family. I am so glad you found me.

Oh, Be Dense!

2008-08-17T18:30:00.004-03:00

Today was a Big Day in our house. It was my first day of school! Instead of taking writing (cuz I don't have opposable thumbs, Mom says), I'm taking Novice Oh-be-dense for Agility.

There were several other doggies there, and when the oh-be-dense lady started talking, so did I! I barked a lot, and then Mom and I got put into the corner. The lady said we were cutting down on my stimuli, but Mom said I was being "the stereotypical rotten teacher's kid".

The lady let us out of the corner and gave Mom liver treats to put in her pocket. We walked around a chair and the lady told Mom to give me liver treats.

Then I sat on my new red mat a lot. Then we walked in circles some more, and then Mom had me walk in a circle around her. Then the liver lady took me for a walk around the chair and gave me liver and told me I was a good girl.

It was a furry good class. I think Mom is getting the hang of how to give me liver treats. I kept losing track of what I was supposed to be doing, though, cuz Daddy kept moving at the other end of the room, and I wanted to go play with him, since I wasn't allowed to play with the other doggies. (He and Mom talked after and he's going to down-stay at home next time.)

Mom says we have a lot of homework to do this week, like walking beside walls and around more chairs.

I don't care where we walk. I'm pretty sure Mom will get the hang of it eventually.

I just want more liver.

Undercover Agent

2008-08-14T13:59:00.005-03:00

So, this is where I've been lately. My entire daytime routine consists of guarding Mom on the bed. I'm either on top of the bed, down at the foot where my pillow is, or in Daddy's spot (cuz he's at work), or right underneath the covers cuz Mom's been running a fever and it's even cozier than usual down next to her knees.

It's been a little boring, except when Mom starts trying to cough up a lung. Then the whole bed shakes violently and she wakes me up. Have some consideration, Mom! Doggies are tryin' to sleep here!

Daddy's been making sure I get to the Bark Park while Mom's been sick, but I'm really missing driving around town with Mom. Oh, for the feeling of the wind in my face ...

I think she's getting better but it sure is taking furever.

Life is Wonderdog!

2008-08-10T00:54:00.002-03:00

I know I haven't woofed much lately, but that's just because I'm having too much fun enjoying summer!

Big 'citement here!

2008-07-24T17:08:00.002-03:00

'Safternoon, Mom and I were laying down watching TV because it's so icky you can almost drink the air here when we heard a loud BANG downstairs!

Mom figured Zaph had knocked something down in the kitchen, so she went downstairs to see. The first thing she noticed was a couple of the spice bottles lying on the floor, so she looked up at the spice rack. Now, our house is an older house, and there used to be a wood stove in the kitchen. The vent to the chimney is above the spice rack, and when Mom looked, it had been popped open HARD (ripping the latex paint) and there were little sooty scramble marks all around it.

Well, Mom looked an' looked, but she couldn't see anything, so we went back upstairs so Mom could use the pooter.

About a half hour later, Mom heard Zaph go from Stealth-Mode to All-Out-Scramble downstairs, so she and I went down to see what was going on. I went down ahead of her and saw something that I didn't like so I came back upstairs pretty quick. Mom decided to lock me in the bedroom because she figured she was going to have to deal with something I wouldn't be any help with.

Zaph had it cornered under a little side table next to the stairs, and it was making lotsa high-pitched chirpy noise, so Mom tossed Zaph into the kitchen and got an old ice cream container with a lid to catch the critter. The noise in the table had stopped, so Mom stuck her head under it furry carefully to see what it was. An' she couldn't see anything! So she furry gently pulled on the drawer handle and all kinds of panicky chirpy noises started up again. So Mom stopped and looked under again and still couldn't see the bird.

At this point, Mom was wondering if it was a bat, because it would hafta be awfully small to fit in the back of the drawer. Rabies hasn't become too widespread here in our area yet, so Mom wasn't too worried. She just wanted to get the critter out cuz he sounded so scared.

(Meanwhile, I was helping as best I could by barking my head off in the bedroom.)

So Mom pulled the drawer a bit, and then another bit, and then finally all the way out, and THE BIGGEST SQUIRREL SHE HAS EVER SEEN LANDED ON THE FLOOR IN FRONT OF HER!

At this point, Mom chucked the ice cream container, cuz it was gonna be totally useless, and watched as the squirrel literally tried to climb the walls. The poor thing was a big red squirrel, but Mom didn't realize that then because he was black with soot, with just a few little red patches showing. He was going crackerdog all over the place!

So Mom went and opened the front door, thinking maybe she could guide the squirrel in that direction, and then she heard Daddy's car coming up the driveway. Knowing that Daddy would open the door that the squirrel was trying to climb, and then the squirrel would take off into the kitchen, maybe stopping on Daddy's head on the way through, Mom ran upstairs to yell out the window to Daddy to use the front door.

Well, the squirrel must've made a break for the front door while she was upstairs, cuz there's no sign of him now ('cept for a coupla poops Mom cleaned up), and Daddy saw a squirrel in the driveway when he was coming around front.

And that's the news from here.

Bark Park Conversation

2008-07-22T20:22:00.004-03:00

Brodie: Doesn't your mom ever put that camera away?

Piper: Is she still pointing it at us?

Brodie: I dunno. I'm not gonna look.

Piper: Well, I'm not going to look either then, 'cuz you'll take off with the stick.

Brodie: Will not.

Piper: Will too.

Brodie: Will not.

Piper: Will too.

Brodie: Well, okay. Maybe. (chomp-chomp-chomp) But it is an awfully good stick.

Piper: Okay, on the count of three, we'll both turn and check. Okay?

Brodie: Okay.

Piper: One ... two ... three!

Brodie: Yup, she's still got the camera.

Chuck-It Real Good ...

2008-07-19T13:06:00.002-03:00

Oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy ...

2008-07-19T08:56:00.004-03:00

Get this, everydoggy! I'm going to go to puppy dog school!

I've been offishully accepted to the ARFF (Agility Runs For Fun) Novice Obedience Class for Agility! Mom and I are both very excited about this.

I already know a lot of the basic commands, and do them most of the time (as long as there isn't a new doggy coming into the Bark Park, but hey -- what's more important?). But it will be really good for both of us! Then we'll take the Advanced course, and then we'll start doing the real Agility thing. (I don't really know what that is, but some other Border Collies think it's a lot of fun, so I wanna do it too!)

It's kinda quiet around here this morning. Zaph tried to wake Mom up for his morning treats at about 4 AM, so she's not moving very fast. (Dad never moves fast in the morning, so that's normal.) But I think it's Saturday, which means that they're both home today, to give me attention, and take naps with me, and take me for walks, and drives in the car ...

But if we go anywhere near water, Daddy -- I'm outta there! (wagwagwag)

Daddy tried to drown me yesterday.

2008-07-18T07:57:00.003-03:00

Daddy is obsessed with getting me in the water. I don't know why. He throws sticks in the water. He throws MyBall in the water. He keeps telling ME to get into the water. He even put a humongous water dish he calls the wading pool in the backyard. I don't know why this is.

Well, yesterday, Daddy came home from work early, and we all got in the car together. It was wonderdog! We went out to the Nature Park and ran through the woods and romped on the beach and it was great -- for a while.

But then Daddy rolled up his pantlegs and went into the water. And then he kept trying to get ME to go into the water. And this wasn't normal water. This was moving water. Water that was sometimes taller. I went out until the taller water washed over my head. And then DADDY PICKED ME UP AND TOOK ME OUT OVER MY HEAD!

I scrambled back to Mom on the shore just as fast as I could. She's the smart hoomin in this house. Daddy is nuts!

(I'm gonna hide next time I hear "swimmin' lessons"!)

I'm just a little fixated.

2008-07-14T11:29:00.001-03:00

(Pssst! Mom says you can buy this as a postcard at Zazzle.com.)

Friends Old and New

2008-07-05T18:57:00.007-03:00

Mom and I went up to the Bark Park today, and Mom was acting a little weird. This isn't all that unusual for Mom (I think you can tell that by now), but she kept saying, "I wonder if you'll remember her."

Well, when we were getting out of the car, another car pulled up. It was a red one, and it had a really nice German Shepherd sitting in the hatchback. Mom and the hoomin in the car were talking like they knew each other, and something about the other hoomin looked familiar ... but from a long, long time ago.

The hoomin and the German Shepherd came down to the Bark Park with us, and we were the only ones there. The German Shepherd (whose name is Matix) and I sniffed and kind of became friends, but she wasn't super-keen to play with me, so I started sniffing the hoomin.

"Piper," Mom said, "do you remember Auntie Deborah, your dogmother?"

And suddenly it all came back! Auntie Deborah was the lady who went to the Restigouche Shelter with Mom and helped her pick me out! It had been a very long time since I'd sniffed her last.

Auntie Deborah said that I was a "big girl now" (since I was only ten weeks old last time she'd seen me).

I decided to see if Auntie Deborah would play with me, so I took the tennis ball to the corner of the fence and dropped it down. I made frantic digging motions to let her know I couldn't reach it, and, sure enough, Auntie Deborah reached under the fence and grabbed it for me. Then she threw it, and I fetched it, and dropped it back down the hole again.

We did this three or four times before Auntie Deborah got tired of the game, so then we just watched Matix catch her toy. Matix isn't sure she wants to be my friend yet, but I'll win her over in time.

Until then, I'll just watch her fly through the air. She's pretty amazing.

The Bed Hog Dogifesto

2008-06-20T07:54:00.004-03:00

I founded this under the bed. Since my predecessor, Pepsi, was the Founding Member and Presidog, and I now have The Bed, I feel it is my duty (not "doody", Zaph -- sheesh!) to repost this.

As a practicing member of the Bed Hog Extraordinaire Club, I, Piper, bring forth this dogifesto:

We, the doggies who are Bed Hogs Extraordinaires, pledge to uphold the following principles and dogjectives:

1) To take up more space in a bed than is caninely possible. The smaller the bed, the bigger we are.

2) To pull all the blankets off our hoomins so that they freeze and need to snuggle us more for warmth (and thus we get 'ttentions).

3) To deny coveted sleeping positions to c*ts (so that they don't steal 'ttentions).

4) To attempt to sleep on top of our hoomins.

5) To slide down the sides of our hoomins, having failed Dogjective 4, but still achieving Dogjective 2.

6) To scratch in the middle of the night, jingling our collar tags so vigorously that our hoomins dream of flying across the night sky in Santa's sleigh.

7) To bring every single disgusting, slimy, and above all, *smelly* hoofie and pig's ear and toy to bed with us, using them to fragrance the hoomins' pillows to make them smell better.

8) To make a lot of noise upholding Dogjective 3.

9) To make "uh-oh-I'm-gonna-barf" noises at least four times each night, thus having the hoomins wake up in a blind panic during which we doggies get lots of 'ttentions.

10) To push and shove our hoomins so that they are either on the very edge of the bed, or else smooshed up against the wall, or relegate them to a 4"x4" corner, so that we, the Bed Hogs Extraordinaires, occupy the vast majority of the bed.

The Big Trip

2008-06-06T22:52:00.006-03:00

For weeks and weeks now, Mom and Dad have been talking about something called The Big Trip. Usually it went something like, "Well, when we go on our Big Trip, Piper's going to need a travel crate for when we stay overnight," or "I wonder if she'll be okay on our Big Trip."

Needless to say, I was pretty confused.

This morning, I was even more confused. Instead of just getting ready and going to Work, Daddy and Mom kept carrying all kinds of stuff out to Dad's car. There were backpacks. There were blankets. There was a giant wood-mounted thing they kept calling "Ian's Map". And then my new collapsible crate went outside, and I really started to wonder.

When I saw MyBall being packed, then I knew it was here.

Today was The Big Trip Day!

When we started down the road, I whined and whined to let my hoomins know that sitting in the backseat was not acceptable. They misunderstood and thought I needed to go OUT, so when I got back to the car, I let them know exactly where I wanted to sit: with Mom.

They didn't like this idea, though, and soon I was in the backseat, with "Ian's Map" between me and my hoomins.

In spite of this indognity, I still kept a watchful eye on everything that was going on. It was a good thing, too, because my hoomins had no idea of the dangers that were lurking in this strange place called Nova Scotia.

For example, when they pulled into the parking lot of a place called the "Parrsboro Rock and Mineral Shop", this horrendous monster was waiting to eat them! As soon as I laid eyes on it, I went absolutely bonkers, growling and barking and threatening to kill it if it so much as took one prehistoric foot towards my hoomins.

And what did my hoomins do? They laughed at me, the ingrates.

Parrsboro wasn't all bad, though. After the place with the ferocious monster, we went to a beach and Daddy said he and I were going to go look for cool rocks. (I think all rocks are cool, but I guess Daddy is more discerning.)

While Daddy looked for rocks, I decided to taste the water. Mom freaked out a bit, saying that it was going to make me sick. She kept offering me water from my travel bottle, but it didn't taste as good. Finally Mom started throwing a stick and I forgot about the salty water.

After Daddy was finished looking for rocks, we went back to the car. Mom said she was getting kind of hungry, and Daddy said he was thinking that maybe I needed a treat. (Like I'm gonna argue with that.)

So we went to a place called Ottawa House, a museum where they have a little snack shop, and Mom and I got ice cream! It didn't taste as good as the salty water did, but it was really close!

After the ice cream, we went back to the Ferocious Monster Place (my hoomins are daft) where Daddy showed the man there some of the rocks he found (and Mom said, "I told you so" when Daddy found out what they were).

Then we started driving again. We drove and we drove and we drove, and then Daddy exclaimed, "What are those?!"

He hit the brakes and I looked at the aliens he was talking about, and I started barking my head off. (They have very scary things in this Nova Scotia place. I guess my hoomins think Ian and Marjorie must be worth visiting, though, to brave these dangers.)

Dad took lots of pictures of these aliens (Mom called them alpacas), and then we started driving again.

Before too long, though, Daddy and Mom started whispering. They weren't saying important things, like "Cookie", or "Bark Park", so I wasn't sure why they were whispering. Then the car slowed down and stopped next to a green field, and both hoomins turned to look at me, expectantly.

"She's not barking," Daddy said.

"Nope," Mom replied. "She's not."

Um, Daddy? Mom?

They're called sheep. I know what they are. What part of "border collie" don't you understand?

Eventually we got to Ian and Marjorie's. I like it here. My travel crate is in the livingroom, and I can play in the woods behind their house, and they keep saying what a Good Girl I am. Best of all, Marjorie said I can sleep in the bed with Mom and Daddy, and it's right next to the computer room (which is how I'm typing this update to you.)

What a wonderdog day it has been!

Gin and Kate: The Final

2008-06-01T21:45:00.003-03:00

Here is the video of their final performance on Britain's Got Talent. Gin and her mom didn't win, but wow -- they are so amazing!

Mom wants me to do agility, but I really want to learn doggy-dancing.

(Piper fires up Google.)

Canine freestyle Canadog ...

Gin and Kate in the Semi-Finals

2008-05-27T20:39:00.000-03:00

This was wonderdog!

Oh, I hope they win. I hope they win i hope they win i hope they w...

Who I Wanna Be When I Grow Up

2008-05-19T20:19:00.004-03:00

One of my doggy friends just sent me a link to this video, and I think it's the most amazing thing ever!

Gin, you are my heroine! I wanna be just like you when I grow up. (I just hope my mom's as smart as your mom!)

I wish we lived in Britain so we could vote. (I know how to speed-dial, you nose.)

One of the bestest things in life ...

2008-05-04T17:17:00.002-03:00

... is sharing with your friends.

There was a great big stick, so five of us tried to play with it at once!

The beautiful dog behind me is Bandit, a genteel lady Border Collie. She didn't play stick a whole lot, but wanted to watch us all have fun.

Life is a highway ...

2008-05-03T17:02:00.002-03:00

Today, Mom and Daddy's took me out in the car for a drive.

I like driving in Daddy's car better than Mom's, because the arm-rests are easier to balance on, but I got the hang of Mom's car today.

They kept checking on me, and saying they were wondering how I was going to make out on The Big Trip. I'm not sure what they were talking about, but that's okay. We've been together long enough now that I pretty much trust them.

(Mostly, anyway.)

My hoomins are so well-trained.

2008-04-22T11:52:00.004-03:00

Oh, thank you, Daddy!

2008-04-20T22:04:00.007-03:00

Way back in August, my mom went on the Internet to find a Border Collie Mix puppy, and she found my siblings and me on the Restigouche County's SPCA site on Petfinder.

There was only one pitchure up at the time, but she saved the page on her pocket-pooter and looked at it for a couple of days. She decided that if the puppy in the pitchure was a female, then that was the one she was gonna adopt.

Well, it wasn't a pitchure of me -- it was a pitchure of my brudder -- but ever since then, Mom has been trying to get the pitchure off the pocket-pooter so she could save it on the real pooter. She's been furry afraid she'd lose it, and she wanted the pitchure to put in my scrapbook.

Well, today Daddy figured out a way to get it off the pocket-pooter for her. So here's a pitchure of my brudder, taken way back when we were little. I hope he is as happy in his home as I am in mine.

This is news?

2008-03-23T12:01:00.009-03:00

Look what I sniffed today:

Even your dog has a blog (CNN)

Hmmm -- they make it sound like dogs using the Internet is new. My predecessor Pepsi was woofing with her furends online way back in 1995.

Amateurs.

Stormy, my kitty-sister, is gone.

2008-02-17T11:28:00.003-04:00

I've been kind of confused the last few days, because Stormy hasn't been here to hiss or growl at me. I kept trying to tell my hoomins that she was missing, but they didn't get it. But I guess I was the one who didn't get it.

Mom just sat me down and let me sniff Stormy's collar and explained that Stormy has gone to The Bridge. She is furry upset, so I licked her face as much as I could, but I think her heart-parts are broken.

You can read about Stormy on my mom's blog here.

Look what we made!

2008-02-10T20:16:00.004-04:00

Mom and I made this beeyootiful Valentine to send to my one true love, Casey.

We have been sneakily getting bits and pieces of his mailing address from his hoomins for weeks now, and Mom is going to take this to the Big Red Box tomorrow. And then Casey will get it in a couple of days, once the Big Red Box is finished with it.

(I don't really trust the Big Red Boxes, but they smell pretty inneresting.)

Now Casey will know how I really feel about him! (wagwagwag)

I am so much in love.

2008-02-09T11:09:00.002-04:00

This is Casey, the love of my life. Ever since I was little, I have worshipped him and professed my admiration by getting in his face and squeak-barking. I bow down to him, to let him know I'm not worthy. He protests by woofing back in that deep voice of his.

I want him to be my Valentine.

YUMMY!

2008-02-05T18:08:00.004-04:00

Look what I just found!

Kong Stuffing Recipes collected from the Internet

Oh, Daddeeeeeeeeee ...

Black and white dog alert!

2008-01-02T14:36:00.002-04:00

I just looked at Mom's blog and the pitchures she took of me yesterday are there. Have I got her wrapped around my little paws or what? Would you believe she was up all night cleaning up my barf, too?

The pitchures are here.

Speaking of my little paws, Mom says I'm a midget. I'm 6 and a half months old and still not very big (look at pics for photographic evi-dents) and she doesn't think I'm a Lab cross anymore. (Unless I'm a runt?)

Oh my dog, I'M BROKEN!

2007-11-25T19:22:00.003-04:00

Hello, Everydoggy,

I've been feeling kind of slow the last couple of days. Just dopey, and sleepy, and not my usual Hyper Piper self. (Shut up, Zaph -- I am NOT usually 'dopey'.) But anyway ... Today I felt more normal, and since I was bored because I haven't been to the Bark Park SINCE THURSDAY, MOM (!), I decided to get some grooming done.

Imagine my shock when I get to my lower belly and there's a HOLE there. Oh, sure, it's sewn up, but there's a HOLE in my BELLY! A hideous HOLE!

Near as I can figure, it must have happened when Mom and Daddy took me to TED (The Evil Doctor) on Friday. The TED I used to know, he decided he was old enough to get new tires, and so I had a new PLV (Pretty Lady Vet). Well, she's obviously into appearances because, as beautiful as I am, she decided to shave one of my legs! She finally listened to me and stopped, but now I've got this bare patch on my left front leg. (Mind you, it's nicely decorated by the spots on my skin, but still.)

To get even with me for arguing with her and wanting to keep my beautiful hairy legs, SHE must have broken me while I was napping. And there's no point in telling Mom or Daddy -- they even forgot to feed me on Thursday night. Not much going on upstairs there. And speaking of stairs -- Daddy keeps carrying me up and down them! What's with that? Have they forgotten that I've been doing that myself since Day Five as Clan Dog?

All I know is that if I don't get up to the Bark Park soon, Kita (that shameless hussy) is going to get big enough that my handsome Casey will fall for her evil ways. And now that I don't have any baby teeth left to lose, I can't smear blood all over her face. I need to get up there -- NOW!

... What's that, Daddy? Naptime? Okay, hang on ....

Thanks fur listening. I have to go snore now.

Daddy says I'm a redneck!

2007-09-16T18:19:00.000-03:00

Hmph ... just because it was raining cccats and hogs yesterday, and my red nylon collar got all wet, now I've got "ring around the collar". And the hoomins think this is funny. Sheesh! Talk about a low humour threshold!

We just got home from our second trip to My Park today. I'm still too young for the the Bark-Park, but I love walking around the rest of Rockwood with my mom. (Rockwood Park is a HUGE municipal park -- ask Bear's hoomins.) There were all kinds of doggies when we were walking -- two Samoyeds, a Pom, a Shih Tzu, and lots of others. There was also a giant Husky who doesn't like puppies. Three old ladies hugged me. It was furry fun!

I get really carsick, but Mom read somewheres that most puppies get carsick because of nerves, not the motion. So since we live so close to the park, she's driving me up there once a day so that I can get happy memories associated with the Barf-mobile and turn it into a Bark-mobile. So far I've gone three times, and we had lotsa drool but no barf. Mom's hoping that this is gonna werk.